Onederland in Pieces
by bludormouse
Summary: After landing on an island in the Grand Line and feasting the night away with her nakama, Robin makes the mistake of being the first to go to sleep. When she awakes, she finds her world has gone to pieces-and its up to her to save the entire crew's sanity
1. Follow Me Down

**Oh no! It's a 'One Piece in Wonderland' fanfic!**

**Yes, I wrote this. And yes, with a DON! I published it! Frobiness galore~! *sparkles confetti sparkles* Yea...I only write Alice in Wonderland and One Piece fics-this was bound to happen, I think.**

**Anyways, enjoy the story!**

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**Onederland in Pieces**

"Oi! Robin-you're not falling asleep already, are you?"

The raven-haired archaeolegist smiled at her rambunctious captain, illuminated by the bonfire behind him, and arm crossed across the shoulder of the sniper. They raised thier mugs of sake questioningly to her, laughing gaily. She shook her head.

"No, just a little...captain-san."

"Neh, Robin," commented the sniper. "Stay awake, stay awake! Kanpai~!"

"Kanpai!" The forest clearing in which they were having thier feast in echoed this feeling instantly, the Mugiwara crew and thier animal guests raising thier heads or mugs at the statement. Robin did likewise, and joined the laughter.

She watched the pair of rowdy boys stomp off to bother Nami, who was sitting at the mouth of her tent nearby. The navigator was sketching the outline of the strange island they had docked on, and therefore wasn't so forgiving as the other female crewmate in being interupted. As she trounced them with her slender, frightening fists, Robin looked across the bonfire to the other crewmates.

Close to her tent, Franky was sitting on the ground. His back was to the fire, and while Chopper and his woodland friends danced in front of the duet of Brooke's violin and his guitar, he strummed a fast tune on the instrument over the hissing string beside him. He was grinning to himself, enjoying himself as much as the other younger crewmates around him. His huge fingers picked and trembled the strings of his guitar, while the firelight silohuetted his huge hulking form.

Robin watched him, tapping her fingers softly to the beat of the music. She felt her eyes drooping again, and was so lulled with sleep that she didn't notice Franky looking at her until he had broken off from the skeleton and the reindeer, and appeared beside her.

She blinked at the new person joining her on her mat, but scootched a little to the side to give him room to sit. He grinned at her surprise, his guitar in his lap. He strummed a chord and said quietly, "Care to give a request, Nico Robin?"

A smile creeped up the quiet bookworm's lips-not her usual enigmatic smile, but the one she couldn't hide from someone like Franky. She pursed them, and said, "How about something...peaceful."

The shipwright barked a laugh. "What? This is a party-you'll fall asleep."

Robin shrugged, and didn't say anything. After a moment of stubborn silence, Franky had to comply.

"Alright, alright," he said, smiling through his act of defiant submission. "Peaceful it is."

The bookworm watched as his fingers delicately touched the strings of his guitar. With a strange softness that seemed to slice through the sounds of the feast going on around them, the notes humming from the acoustic instrument siezed Robin's ears. She could not put her finger on the name of the tune, but it had almost a waltz's beat to it. It carried across her body and up into the smoke-choked air of the forest canopy, dancing with a 1-2-3 beat that echoed the stepping of her heartbeat.

Brooke was most definitely the ship's muscian, being that any instrument he picked up he could play with expert skills...but it was hard to contest the Sunny Go's shipwright and his talent with a guitar.

Robin felt her eyes dropping thier curtains again. While mostly an insomniac, something about the tranquility of this island, the low grumbles of Franky's guitar, and the fact that she had stayed up the past two nights over a book about a girl and her adventures in a hole in the ground, made her feel swept with fatigue. Without her concious compliance, her body slowly dropped to lay on its side. The bookworm rested her head in her arms. She closed her eyes, still listening to the guitar playing beside her. She didn't miss when Franky chuckled at the moment she lost the fight against slumber, and said quietly, "Goodnight, Nico Robin."

/

When Robin woke up, she instantly felt something was wrong.

The bonfire was left to nothing but a pile of ash and black wood, leaving the clearing immersed in the dark of the night. It was almost pitch black, but a few stars in the sky were able to muster the light for an quite ample view of the Mugiwara campsite. The...very empty Mugiwara campsite.

While her crewmates things and tents were still there, untouched, Robin arose to her feet to find herself completely alone. Her blue eyes scanned every inch of the site, and with every passing second found this fact to be absolutely true. Her nakama had vanished.

The calm woman's mind rushed with thoughts on where they could be. She mused for a long moment in the quiet clearing, her arms crossed in silence. Sadly, she couldn't come up with a single tangible idea. What would have possibly caused them to leave so suddenly without her, as quiet as mice and without bringing a single thing along with them? Robin walked from one crew-mate's sleeping area to the next, examining thier things. Usopp had left his goggles, Franky and Brooke thier instruments, and even Zoro left his swords. The last caused her quite a bit of uncharacteristic anxiety-Swordsman-san rarely left his swords behind after all. Yet the last thing she found, lying neglected beside the wrinkled blanket of her captain's on the grass, disturbed her the most.

It was Luffy's hat.

She stared at it in disbelief, trying to absorb the enormity of this. No, Luffy never just left his hat, never left it from his head. Never. She bent down to her knees and picked it up. Robin dusted off some specks of dirt on it, then thumbed its ratty rim. She looked around. Slight panic rippled through her chest. Suddenly, the bookworm felt very alone.

Where was everyone?

Robin, ever a stoic pillar of emotionless resolve, only let this emotion of panic hover in her mind for a moment. Then, with a sigh and a shudder of her shoulders, she quickly executed it from her brain to regain her usual emotionless pause. Her mind's gears went hard to work as they tried to find a solution on what to do. It came rather quickly-an easy way to find her nakama, quick and effectively. Placing the strawhat around her neck and on her back, for safekeeping, the Hana Hana no Mi user crossed her arms across her chest and closed her eyes. She concentrated, picturing in her mind an eye appearing on every tree trunk in a mile radius, to spy a member of her crew.

She stood like that for quite a while. Her brow furrowed deeper and deeper, and a bead of sweat appeared and dripped across her back. She could see nothing, until she finally gave up and opened her own, original blue eyes. Her powers had not worked.

More panic had to be quelled from the calm woman's chest-she looked around, but could see no sea stone or other such thing hindering her abilities. She tried again, this time endeavoring to just making one eye appear. She tried to make a slender arm appear from the ground. From her back. In the end, she gave up each time.

Robin was powerless. She bit her lip, and felt her body shake a little. Such panic was a little too extreme to kill adequately.

At that moment, a nearby bush rustled suspiciously. Robin turned her head, and was surprised to see a small, frightened animal hiding from her behind a tree. Except, he was hiding from the wrong side. And she recognized him. "Ch...Chopper?"

The little reindeer froze in panic. He was devoid of his hat, and wearing a strange waistcoat on his furry body, but yes it was definitely the ship's doctor, Chopper. Yet he was staring at her as if he didn't recognize her.

Robin edged closer to him, a relieved smile lighting her face. "Chopper! Its so good to see you. I was worried-where is everyone..."

Every step Robin took towards him, the reindeer took three backwards. He uttered a silent scream of terror at her spotting him, yet seemed to not be able to turn away. Robin blinked at his odd behaviour. She couldn't help but notice in the dim light that perhaps his fur was discolored-almost white. What had happened to him?

"Chopper...?"

That's when the reindeer cried out. He turned and fleed from his usually respected colleague and 'mother figure', making her quite confused.

"Ah! Wait!" Immediately, Robin gave chase. She dove into the underbrush of the forest, leaving the campsite after the quick moving reindeer. She was instantly swept into darkness, yet followed the distinct sound of Chopper's footsteps on the moist ground. She called his name: "Chopper! Chopper wait, please!"

"Stay away from me!" he screamed back, sounding farther and farther away. "Dirty human! Monster!"

Thorns and briars tore at Robin's skin and clothes. She lifted her arm to save her face, never slackening her pace in the dark woods after her only visible nakama. "Wait! Wait-"

Suddenly, Robin was falling. She stepped onto nothing but the empty mouth of a huge hole, and tumbled down into nothingness.

/

The fall wasn't that impressive, Robin thought afterwards. A second of weightlessness in the pitch black, and soon she hit the bottom. The bookworm lifted her head to find herself unhurt, having had a large cushion of something to break her fall. She shifted on it-it felt of the texture of crunching leaves.

Nico Robin looked around. From her mountain of discarded particles of foliage, she turned her head and saw something spearing through the detailess dark-a sliver of light falling on the floor. It came from some sort of doorway, the seemingly only way out of this huge, dark room. The young woman was quick to meet it. She slipped down the side of the tall haystack of leaves, and walked across the moist ground to the opening.

'A rather small opening though,' she thought to herself. She studied it, then bent down and tried to look through to the other side. Light blinded her and hurt her eyes. Robin looked away, overwhelmed by the glare and the intoxicating smell of flowers.

Doubt creeped into her mind at moving forward. Yet she ignored it-'This is the only way out, afterall.' Still, she hesitated.

Thoughts of her missing nakama suddenly flooded her mind, resolving her internal confliction for her. Yes, she needed to go on. Robin sighed through her nostrils, and got on her hands and knees. The darkness deserted her as she crawled through the tight hole-it was replaced with soft morning light permeating through the strange trees overhead.

/

The sudden change in daylight bewildered Nico Robin. Yet not as much as the details of the area she had entered into.

Turning around, she saw that she had crawled out from the space between the enormous roots of a tree. She looked up at the tall oak, but did not gawk-when the Mugiwara crew had landed on the island, they had found it to be seemingly infested with these tight-knitted giants, whose sparse leaves barely blocked the sun and whose girth was monstrous. Around the tree, its fellows of the same species made an impregnable wall of a treeline, making it impossible for Robin to go back. That is, unless she went back through the tiny entrance she had just come from and try her luck from there. She didn't think that that was an effective use of her time.

What surprised Robin was the folia behind her, taking the trees' place as the emperors of a strange wilderness. They were a forest...of oversized garden flowers! Daisy, daffodils, pansies, morning glories, cosmos, poppies, snap dragons and zinnias-an assortment of every flower that could be crammed into a garden patch was of gargantuan proportions before her, cluttered together to produce a thick wood. She marveled at the sight, all glistening with the dew of morn and with stalks that creaked with the light wind. Yet she wasted little time in studying these things-a sound was coming from the plants, musical like a march being tapped out by a snare drum. She ignored her curiousity and dived inbetween the leaves of a group of daisies towards the sound.

The sound was coming from ahead, and she could see between the flower stalks a warm glow that wriggled through the shadows. Robin could hear more instruments along with-small pipes, brassy horns, and a deep-throated drum. Nothing hampered her way as she ran. She simply hoped, mumbling under her breath, that with these oversized plants, there didn't come with a set of oversized garden creatures.

Suddenly, breaking through the silence and the pounding of a snare drum, came a distinct sound-a sinister chuckle close to her ear. "Fufufu...what an ingenious idea, Nico Robin."

Robin's eyes widened. She quickly turned on her heel; yet instead of facing the speaker, she saw no one there. But she could have sworn-

There was no time for swearing. The earth began to quake beneath the archaeoligist's feet, making the flower-trees quiver and uplift thier roots. She stepped back as a mound of earth rose from the ground in front of her, as if something was tunneling through the ground towards her.

Finally, something monstrous broke through the surface-it waved its legs in the sky and screamed through its mandibles-

"ScrrrEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!"

Robin stared in horror at the behemoth of a centipede, colored in the shade of dried blood. For a second, she lost the ability to move her legs.

The beast clicked its pincers at her, its saliva dripping near her boot. The ooze slapped the ground and began hissing a scorchmark on the earth. Acidic, Robin realized.

Suddenly, the screeching creature dove at her.

Robin snapped out of her paralyzation-she sprung into the air and dodged the salivating mouth of the insect. It crashed into a cluster of morning glories, ripping them asunder and screaming ferociously. A pair of poppies were what the human woman used for cover; yet the monster was not easy to fool with hide-and-seek games. As soon as it lost sight of her, it whipped its head around and followed her with its sensory glands to where she fell. Its antennae probed the air like snapping whips, going to each flower until it came to the poppies.

It clawed apart the flowers, and snapped at the woman cowering behind them. She cried out, and rolled away. Bad decision. The insect turned, reared up on the upper half of its body, and aimed at the frightened woman staring up at its souless eyes from her back. Its pincers dripped poison and acid, and it flecked drops of them at her as it gave a shrill scream.

{To Be Continued...}

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I hate centipedes {They should all DIE}. Is it that evident?

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Begs to Be

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Pushed

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	2. The Queen's Garden

The centipede's scream, however, was cut short.

A spear flew over Robin's head at the gargantuan insect-it pierced its exoskeleton right in the middle of its reared chest. The beast paused, not quickly assesing what had happened. Then, it flung back its head and shrilled, wriggling spastically from the pain. Robin stared at it, and did not notice when someone grabbed under her arm and pulled her away until they stopped. She looked up as they released her arm and stood with military discipline. "...Zoro?"

The green-haired swordsman did not look at her when she said his name. He kept his eyes forward, glaring in boredom at the suffering centipede. He was dressed rather oddly-his body was encased in bright red plate armor, suitable for the knights of North Blue that Robin had read about. On his head was a strange helmet that covered everywhere but the front of his head-it was in the shape of an upside down red heart.

Before Robin could comment on his new look, he lifted his finger at the writhing animal and said behind him. "You heard the Queen-off with its head. Move."

"SIR YES SIR!" The thundering of footsteps suddenly passed them. Soldiers of nearly the same armor as thier commander appeared from behind the two to quickly march from both of Zoro and Robin's sides, single-file. They circled the centipede, giving it a wide girth. It was stilling screaming and spouting blood in blind showers.

Robin watched as Zoro lifted his sword to signal his men. They did the same, and suddenly charged at the beast. As one unit, they finished the creature off, with savage prescision. It dropped its head, and the soldiers simultaneously stepped back into a circle to let its body fall unmoving onto the ground.

"Is it dead yet?"

The female voice that came from behind made Robin jump. It was Nami's voice. She whipped her head around to see the orange-haired navigator, sitting on a red velvet covered platform carried by two foot soldiers, on a sort of throne.

Zoro turned his head. "Yes, Your Majesty. Its dead."

"Excellent," she replied. Leaning back in her chair, she crossed her arms and growled, "Disgusting creature-ruining my beautiful kingdom with its...ugliness."

Someone next to Nami chuckled. "Seems we'll be having stewed centipede in the palace this week. I know an excellent recipe-"

The navigator scoffed. "What have I told you? Leave cooking to the servants."

Robin couldn't see the other man beside Nami-she was much too busy absorbing her new appearance with her eyes.

The navigator was not in her usual skimpy clothing. No, that wasn't exactly true-the ornate gown perhaps wasn't her usual short skirt and low-neck top, but it was revealing enough. An enormous slit in the gold corset showed her bulging breasts quite well. The tiny crown on her head was also gold, and decorated with ruby hearts.

The orange-haired lady suddenly turned her attention to the archaeoligist. She pursed her lips at Robin, and gave her a disapproving look. "And _who_...is this?"

Beside her was a man, also in ornate gold and red clothing-only he was dressed as a high-ranking noble straight from a fairy-tale. He took one look at Robin, and hearts appeared to replace his eyes. His tongue rolled out, and he cried, "Mellorine~! What a lovely flower...I have never seen such loveliness before!"

"Tch." The green-haired swordsman sneered at the lovesick king Sanji, and growled under his breath, "King of Retardia."

At the insult, the cook's temper instantly flipped. He shot a glare at the knight-"What was that, shit bastard? You disrespecting the KING?"

Zoro snarled. He got up in Sanji's face-or at least as far as he could get, what with the hieght difference. "Shuddap, stupid curly-browed king! I don't work under you-I'm a mercenary for the Red King."

"But I'M hiring you...that means, if you wanna get paid, Marimo, you have to listen to me-"

"Like hell I do!"

Robin watched the two fight, Zoro threatening Sanji with his sword while Sanji took advantage of the higher ground and send a volley of kicks at Zoros face. She was slightly glad to see that at least some things hadn't changed.

"SILENCE!"

Nami's shrill voice echoed through the forest of flowers. The other males didn't utter a peep. Nami slowly turned and let her deadly imperial glare fall on all of them; seeing them submitting to her will effectively, she turned and pointed harshly at Robin. "You," she said accusingly. "Just what _are_ you...?"

Robin only hesitated for a moment. Then, she asked softly, "You don't know who I am-"

"Well," Nami snapped. "You're not an insect. And you're not a flower. And you are most _certainly_ not anyone of importance...for if you were, I would have remembered you."

Nico Robin said nothing, absorbing this. She looked at Sanji, then at Zoro. Though Sanji was too busy calling her "charming flower" and the like, both looked at her as if they had never saw her before. She frowned, yet showed no other emotion beyond slight perplextion.

The bookworm looked up at the queen's smouldering eyes. If it hadn't been Nami's face behind those eyes, she probably would have been very terrified. She muttered politely, "I think...I've seemed to have gotten lost."

She would have said more, but the flushed look crossing the queen's face made her stop.

There was a long beat of silence.

Queen Nami snarled: "Weed."

This seemed to grab everyone's attention. They waited for Nami to go on.

After another moment, the orange-haired navigator continued, quite slowly, "There is a _weed..._in my garden."

Robin blanched, obviously the one being called 'a weed'. She did not miss that with those words, the soldiers were taking a new interest at her. They turned on thier heels and stared at her. Coldly. A menacing cloud suddenly hanged over the party of royals, knights, and the bookworm.

Sanji whined, "Aww...my dear, do we really have to? She's such a pretty thing-" He stopped when the orange-haired queen turned her head to look at him. He cowered away.

The soldiers gripped thier weapons, an assortment of lances, swords, and heart-tipped spears. Robin felt a bead of sweat drip down her neck. This had suddenly turned for the worst.

/

She did not waste time. Robin spun around and ran. She could hear the stinging command of the queen hit her ears as she turned: "OFF WITH HER HEAD!"

The soldiers had no time to react. Robin sprung from the small pathway they had been conversing on, to the forest of enormous flowers. She sprinted, pushing wildly past delicate green stalks to somewhere out. Anywhere but her once loyal green-haired nakama's gleaming red sword.

"FOLLOW HER, YOU FOOLS! OFF WITH HER HEAD-OFF WITH IT!"

After a few minutes, the woman heard heavy footsteps coming towards her. They were gaining ground. The woman became desperate. She clawed up abandoned ant hills, and weaved her way through a nettled rose bush. She hid, sitting on the ground in the cover of the twisting, thorned rose stalks and wrapping her arms around her legs. She buried her head and listened to the footsteps.

They marched in a hurriedly with uniform precision. Zoro was leading them it seemed, shouting at them formations and directions._ Thank god he's the one leading them_, Robin thought. The heavy footsteps came near the bush, yet suddenly gave a wide turn from it to some other place. For now, Robin was safe.

Yet even though she was safe, Robin did not instantly get up from her despairing position. Her nakama...none of them seemed to remember her. Zoro, Nami, Sanji...Chopper...what had happened to them? Were the others also like this, scattered in this...this place? What was this place-where was she? Robin looked around, at the giant roses shining with dew in the sun above, and the other enormous flowers peeking through thier dark green leaves. She remembered how just a few hours ago, it had been night-how she had had such fun times with her crew members.

She wanted to go back to it. Back to the normalcy of the Mugiwara crew.

Robin buried her face again, between her knees. She listened to the giant flying insects flitting about overhead, and the wind blow through the tops of the tall flora. Her back began to shake.

"Oh dear...oh dear, how late! The Queen of Hearts is going to kill me for this!"

The woman lifted her head, her eyes red and poofy, but wide. She turned around, to stare at what ran by the bush. Standing, she stealthily pursued it.

The reindeer had reappeared, not noticing the raven-haired woman following him as he talked to himself and stared at his watch: "Aw...this isn't good. I'm twenty minutes late! What'll I do, what'll I do-I'll lose my head for sure! Lets see...need to stop by my house-kid gloves, fan, jam, toenail clippers...where are my toenail clippers? The desk perhaps! Oh, I should try better organization. Then I wouldn't be so tardy! But who has time to pick up?"

Nico Robin found it hard to follow the rapidly walking reindeer-for though he had such tiny legs, he seemed to be in an abnormal hurry. The woman finally had to stop and stash away her knee high heeled-boots, then continue her stalking of Chopper with effective bare-feet.

There were moments when the wind blew from behind Robin, and she had to hide as Chopper's nose began to twitch and he stopped to smell. Yet he never tried to look behind him, and quickly returned to hurrying down the small path and talking rhetorically while Robin came out and followed him once more. He led her out of the forest of flowers, to a perfectly normal one, of normal sized deciduous trees.

Except the leaves were colored random pastels. Still, Robin took this as being as normal as it was going to get.

A path of ancient cobblestones appeared from the treeline into the forest, and the reindeer instantly jumped on it and scampered away. Robin was not far behind, yet after a moment she felt that she had lost him. Luckily, the road had no forks, nor any other pathways interconnecting with it. Robin followed the road, until she finally came to where it ended: a quaint little cottage.

She was slightly amused to see that the cottage's hay-covered roof had antlers on it. There was no doubt that this was the house Chopper had been muttering about. It was a whitewashed little home, decorated with red hearts and with a large front yard littered with blossoming cherry trees. The gate of the low stone wall surrounding it was left open, so therefore Robin crept across the yard and slipped into the house.

The bookwormed payed little heed to the stuffy details of the gaudy insides of the house-instead, she listened to the sound of the reindeer's muffled rantings from above, and took the flight of nearby stairs. She crept very slowly up them. However, before she got even close to the top, Chopper was suddenly stomping down them. Robin felt panic flutter in her chest, and pressed her back to the wall in a vain attempt to hide. The frantic reindeer met her at the step-he nearly passed by her, so obsessed in his self-musing, but stopped and looked up.

Robin stared at him, wondering what he would do.

To her surprise, he began chatising her: "Marianne! Just WHAT do you think you are doing?"

The bookworm's face went blank. Who was Marianne?

She took it to be directed at herself, being she was the only other person in the house, and he continued to glare straight at her eyes. She stumbled, "I-I was...I was just..."

Yet she was interupted by the clucking of Chopper's tongue and the shaking of his head. "Tut tut tut...if you have enough time to stand there stuttering at me, silly girl, then"-the reindeer suddenly grabbed Robin, and after managing to get behind the shocked woman, began pushing her up the stairs-"then you have enough time to get up here and help me find my gloves! For toad's sake, I'm not paying my maid to just stand around, gawking like a fish!"

Robin let herself be manhandled by the small animal, very confused. She followed him into a bedroom at the top floor of the house. Instantly, he sprang onto his dresser and began digging through its contents-by discarding all non-glove items over his shoulder and onto the floor. She stiffly watched him, and jumped when he looked up and snarled, "Don't just stand there, Marianne! Help me find my gloves!"

"Y-Yes!" Robin paused, then turned and followed the reindeer's example. She tore open the drawer of a desk, and tidily searched through it. Not finding the gloves, she closed it, and opened another one. Both kept this wild search for at least five minutes. Suddenly, Chopper lifted his head with a cry. "AH! The mailbox-of course!"

Robin watched as the reindeer randomly ran out the room. He tripped down the stairs; a moment later, she heard the slam of the heavy front door. With her hands still submerged in the contents of the top of the chester drawer, the woman found she was all alone.

The raven-haired bookworm stood up straight, and tried to process what had just happened. In the flurry of random events, she had forgotten why she had come chasing after Chopper. Now that he was gone, she felt regret for not trying to do something-anything, though she knew not what she could do.

Utterly lost, the usually collected woman looked around. The room was very large, and as gaudy and lace-covered as the rest of the house.

_MMmmmgggrrrggghhhhh_. Robin heard her stomach growl. She frowned, feeling swept with fatigue. She wondered if there was any food she could take, perhaps in Chopper's kitchen. She felt sorry for stealing from her nakama, but...right now he wasn't all himself. And she was sure that if she did it quietly, he wouldn't mind.

Just as she was about to head downstairs for the pantry, a silver box of pastel-iced sugar cookies caught her eye. The baked treats were lying on a doily inside the box, and looking perfectly innocent in the sun beside a bottle of strange liquid. Robin walked over to the end table they sat on, and picked one up.

"Eat me," she read. Those two words were written with icing in perfect cursive, on every cookie. She looked at it, thinking. Seemed rather pushy for a cookie. Was it right to take a food's suggestion about itself?

Robin could have kicked herself. Just what was she thinking? She swore she was making less and less sense with every passing minute in this place.

The woman's stomach growled again, much louder this time. Robin studied the cookie, finding it to look perfectly edible. Without a second thought, she took a huge bite of the cookie.

{To Be Continued...}

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Perhaps not a very exciting ending to a chapter. Unless you know what an 'Eat Me' cookie means.

Thanks for reading, dear reader! Please tell me what you think, if you have the time. ^.^


	3. The White Reindeer's Home

After thoroughly searching the mailbox, from top to bottom, the white reindeer finally gave up and turned his search somewhere else. Slumped over, he decided that perhaps it _was_ inside his house. He walked across his front lawn, and put his hoof on the doorknob. Imagine his intense surprise when an oversized woman's foot suddenly crashed through his front door, causing him to leap into the nearby flower bush as it shot out into the yard.

It seemed that not only was the scenery of this place was strange-the food had odd effects as well. Robin thought this to herself as her body suddenly began to grow-so fast that she had to adjust her body as quickly as possible while limbs shot out of windows and doorways. She managed to somewhat direct her arms through the splintering walls of the bedroom, into the large windows on either side of the second story. The woman cared not where her feet went; they sloped downstairs and she quickly lost sight of them. Her head hit the cieling with a loud thunk-to her dismay, she continued growing, and therefore her head had to crash through the top. The splitting wood that she pushed through scratched her face, yet luckily she stopped growing before she hit the roof. She had no idea how the second floor was holding her weight, but was thankful nonetheless.

Robin blinked, and looked about the attic she had breached. _Seems to be a sunroom_, she thought. _Or a greenhouse-strange to have a greenhouse on top of one's house_. The woman found that the hay which covered the roof didn't apply to the hot little room, and through its opened, green-tinted windows she could witness all that was happening outside in the front lawn.

It seemed the white-furred Chopper was having a spastic attack about her...two feet jutting out of his house. _Oh, so that's where they went_. With slight amusement, the woman wiggled her toes and stretched. This seemed to only worsen the reindeer's condition.

"MONSTER!" he screamed, interchanging from running in circles to rolling on the ground. "THERE'S A MONSTER IN MY HOUSE! OH, HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN-MONNNNNSSSSTTTEEERRR!"

Robin smirked. How overdramatic, she thought.

After a moment of quietly laughing at the reindeer's display, she frowned. In all seriousness...just how was she going to get out? No matter how much Robin wiggled, she couldn't loosen herself-it only made the cottage creak and the wood start to give, as if she was trapped in a house made of glue and popscicle sticks. She found it a shame to destroy the house...yet if it was the only way to get out, what could she do?

The woman's thoughts were interupted when she saw who was walking down the road-a very familiar green-haired knight. She cringed-it seemed Zoro had better luck with directions in this place then anywhere else. Still, he hadn't misplaced his expression of being utterly lost.

The lone knight walked up to Chopper. He ignored his antics, and growled, "Oi. Tanuki-do you know where I am?"

"I'M A REINDEER!" Chopper had stopped rolling in the grass to lividly snap this at Zoro, as if automatically. When his rage subsided, he blinked at the swordsman. Then his eyes got wide.

"AH! You're a knight!"

Zoro frowned, not saying anything for a second. He then carelessly picked at the wax in one of his ears. "Your point?"

Chopper didn't seemed dismayed by the red knight's nonchalant actions. He leaped to his feet and cried excitedly, "There's a monster in my house-a huge monster! Quick, quick attack it...save my house! Please please please!"

Zoro blinked. He leaned and stared at Robin's foot as if he had just noticed her. Thankfully, he didn't seem to recognize the owner of the slender limbs and the blue eyes staring down at them.

He turned back to the reindeer. "What can I do about it?"

Chopper quickly grew angry. "You're a knight!" he cried. "You're suppose to help people-to kill big monsters and stuff!"

"First of all, that first thing you said is a common misconception about me. Second of all..." Zoro crossed his arms and glowered at the small reindeer. "I don't give handouts-I'm a mercenary knight."

Chopper's face fell. "M...Mercenary knight?"

"Yep. If you got money, I guess I could help..."

While the swordsman turned and flicked to the ground the ball of earwax on his finger, the reindeer's lip quivered. His eyes got large and watery, and snot began to drip down his nose. "B...But I don't have any. Sniff. I left my purse...hick...in my house..."

Zoro made the mistake of looking back at the reindeer in this state. 'Crap!' was written all over his face-rarely anyone was immune to Chopper when he got like this. Another thing, Robin noticed, that hadn't changed. Beads of sweat dripped down the back of the swordsman's face as he watched the animal sob dryly and mutter about his lateness and devoidance of money. Finally, he sighed. "Alright, alright. Stop that already-I'll see if I can help."

Robin frowned. This could be bad. Yet Chopper seemed estatic: "Yay! Thank you thank you thank you!"

Zoro huffed, and uncrossed his arms as he walked to some firewood laying nearly on the side of the wall. He grabbed the split logs, in great armfuls, and dumped them between Robin's legs. He then went back to get some more, and on both trips Chopper was prancing behind him, singing his thanks and helping by managing to carry a single block of wood.

"Hey-Red Knight!" he asked, after the third trip for wood. "How are you going to get the monster out? You going to drag it out and kill it?" He grinned, oblivious to what they were doing by the fact that he was getting quick assistance from a strong knight.

"No." Zoro dumped the wood into the pile, and took out a box of matchsticks from somewhere beneath his armor. He took one red-tipped match and lit it. "I'm going to burn the house down."

"Ah, yes. What an wonderful idea-why hadn't I thought of that...WHAT?" Chopper dropped his piece of wood and gawked at Zoro.

He stopped and stared at the reindeer. "Yes-we're smoking it out. That should drive the thing away...or at least kill it."

"NO! That is definitely NOT what we're going to do!" Chopper tugged nervously at his waistcoat and cried, "What's wrong with you-how can you even say that? My poor house...!"

Zoro snarled. "Well...do _you_ have a better idea?"

Robin certainly hoped so. She didn't know if she could survive the house encasing her suddenly being engulfed in flames. That would make escaping much trickier.

Thankfully, a voice appeared from beyond Robin's view, "Oi! Reindeer-Gorilla. It's been six weeks-where's my pay for that leak I fixed for you?"

The two in the front lawn-an annoyed Zoro and a sobbing, anxious Chopper-turned to look at the person walking up to them from the side of the house. Robin thought the voice was familiar, but didn't have time to reflect on this. Just then, Zoro dropped the match he had been holding-straight under the pile of kindling and firewood.

/

A small flame appeared between Robin's legs. _Oh no!_ She felt panic rise in her throat. She had no way to put the fire out-

"OI! What the HELL do you think you're doing to my house?"

A young man-a very strange one with no pants-ran between the duo standing on the lawn and the fire. He began to kick dirt hastily onto it, then proceeded to stomping on it with his bare feet. Thankfully, the little flame died before it did any real damage.

Zoro cocked an eyebrow. "_Your_ house?"

The young man, clad in only a speedo (A _speedo_?) and a tropical printed vest, looked up and frowned at the intimidating swordsman. Something was trailing behind him-almost like a tail, but Robin couldn't see very many details about the newcomer. He seemed to have enough gumption in his rough voice to mouth off to the knight: "Yea, _my_ house-and I'd like to know what the hell you think you're doing to it!"

Zoro didn't seem phased by this insubordination. He thumbed at Chopper, who seemed to be too wrapped up in his anxieties at the moment. "He said it's his."

"It is! I built it for him. And I still gotta maintain it for him! So when you break it, GUESS WHO'S GOTTA FIX IT!"

The stranger didn't wait for Zoro to reply, for he already had a finger stuck up in Zoro's face. "It's a masterpiece, understand? One of the best I've ever done-so don't go wrecking it with your stupid damn matches-HOLY CRAP!"

As if one had to guess, that was the exact moment the handyman noticed Robin's legs. He stood thier flabbergasted, randomly pointing between the legs, the feet, the arms, the hands, THOSE EYES; he stuttered for words. "Wh-Wh-Wh-Wh-Wha?"

Chopper sniffed, then saw his handyman. His mood seemed to get better, but he dived into the man's arms and bursted into sobs. "FRANKKKYYYY! Save my house-a monster's inside it!"

Franky-though Robin suspected it to be a different Franky, for this one was much shorter, and much too...proportional, upper-bodily speaking-stared down at the reindeer he cradled.

"M...Monster?" It wasn't a squeak of cowardice. More like a question, tipped with anger. He looked up at Robin's eyes. He seemed to be glaring. "A monster, ah?" he snarled.

/

Robin had no time to listen to this little drama play out any longer. She had to find some way to get out of this predicament. But what?

An idea suddenly struck her. If some things she ate made her small...then surely eating something else would cause other effects to her. Maybe even make her smaller! Or perhaps bigger...but even if that happened, she still would be able to break out of this doll-house sized cottage's imprisonment. She felt this was very shakey logic, but in the end decided anything was better than nothing.

Yet what could she find to eat, when her head was stuck in a greenhouse?

As it turned out, quite a few. It seemed Chopper kept a store of picked vegetables in stacked crates about the room...and her sudden entrance had caused some to scatter about the floor. Just out of reach, though, with all the luck.

/

While Robin focused on getting the tiny morsels into her mouth, Zoro sneered at Franky's obvious disdain for what was wrecking 'his masterpiece'. "What? You gonna do something about it-lizard?"

"You're damn right I am!" To prove it, the man ran to the side of a house, and a few minutes later came back with a very long ladder. He propped it up against the cottage's north-facing side, and quickly climbed up it. The other two watched-Zoro boredly while Chopper anxiously interchanged his view from the handyman to his pockwatch. They both could hear Franky muttering blacky under his breath: "Damn disrespectful monsters...tearing up my house-I swear, if its done unrepairable damage, I'll..."

/

Robin desperately tried to wriggle her tongue at a large radish in front of her, the size of her head had she still been small. It rolled every which way but into her mouth, no matter how much she licked and bit at it. She glanced at the window-Franky appeared at where his ladder could reach, the rooftop of the second floor. She could hear his rhetorical muttering from the window...yet oddly also from between her legs. She glanced her ice blue eyes downward, to the fireplace below. It was belching clouds of soot from the chimney...and the distinct sound of grunting came from its mouth. She cocked an eyebrow-was this Franky semi-look-alike trying to enter via the chimmney? All the more reason to hurry and end her enlargement.

Lancing her tongue at the radish did nothing but make a mess; therefore, the raven-haired woman tried another tactic. She began to inhale-deeply with her mouth-wide. The over-sized purple root shuddered, and scooted across the floor towards her. She took a breath, paused, then tried it again...the radish got even closer with the vacumning air. She could just barely reach it now-she stuck out her tongue and gingerly rolled it forward. She was finally able to encase it in her mouth.

As she chewed and swallowed, she could hear the handyman slipping down the chimmney. Yet he must have lost his footing, for suddenly he was shouting and coming very quickly down the bricked fireplace. Robin found the root to be bitter-but the affects to be instantaneous. She screamed as she found her tiny body suddenly falling through the air, plummeting from the hole she had made in the greenhouse's floor, to the distant bottom of the white reindeer's bedroom.

/

A split second later, Franky found he had tumbled out of the chimmney, and in a series of rolls had finally landed on his back to lay groaning in the middle of the room. He rubbed his head, and looked up. What he saw coming towards him made him leap to his feet and lift his arms.

After a second of moving from place to place, he finally caught the falling woman: "Mmmf-gotcha! Hey, babe...you okay?"

Robin felt for sure she was dead-she had had no time for seeing her past flash before her eyes, but she knew there was no way she could have survived that drop. Yet her fears were discarded when she felt strong, lithe arms gently encasing her. She opened her eyes, slowly, and saw that it was her nakama, Franky. Only much different. And...scalier?

{To Be Continued...}

* * *

Yea...I went back and broke up my last two chapters...I found it amusing to make a challenge for myself-put as much storyline of the scene as possible, but keep the chapter to at most 2,750 words. Hopefully this will break me out of my constant long-windedness.

Yup...new chapter. :3 And yes-next to the Mad Hatter, my favorite character is Bill the Lizard. It comes from childhood-in Disney's Alice in Wonderland, my favorite scene (besides the tea party) was the one at the White Rabbit's house. I thought the cockney, scaley chimney sweep to be hilarious, especially coupled with the Dodo. Oh, the little things that make you gigglesnort as a larvae fangirl.

Anywhose-thanks for reading! I look forward to your continued support-reviews are nice, but...well, if you can't find the time, then don't worry yourself. Still, they _are_ nice, all the same.

Next chap has another character in an odd pair of wonderland shoes for himself...at least I think so. It is _Crocodile_, afterall.


	4. Blood Wood and Moon Mushrooms

Robin stared at the young man named Franky. He stared right back-though more perplexed than surprised. He squinted his right eye a little as he cocked his head. She watched as his spiked cyan hair didn't move-that's right, his hair was spiked. Not put in a ridiculous ducktail style, which was the staple of the Mugiwara crew's shipwright, but numerous spikes protruding forward from the top of his head, and with the rest of his hair falling on the back of his neck. Holding these spikes back from his face were a pair of goggles.

It wasn't only the hair that was different. Things like speedo-sporting, his island patterns in his shirts and tops (though Robin knew she had never seen him in a vest), his hairy thin legs were the same: and when she looked into his eyes, she knew it was him. No one had eyes like Franky-no one came close.

Yet the raven-haired woman also knew that when arms had encircled her to catch her from the air, they had been thin arms of warm flesh (his skin was very dry, she noticed), muscle and blood. Not thick appendages of metal, interlayed beneath the skin-like surface with numerous gadgets and weapons. Even pressed to his chest, she could hear the hammering of mechanisms purely biological-a heartbeat fluttered under his chest, and his breathing echoed around her. It sounded...nervous.

She snapped out of her trance and took a better look up at the man's face-he did seem a little tense. Perhaps wondering why she was staring at him for so long, so intently. He cleared his throat, and repeated quietly (in Franky's voice) his question, "Um...are you alright?"

Robin paused, then vigorously nodded.

"Y-Yes. My apologies. I..." She stopped, a little lost for words. Finally, she motioned for him to set her down.

"Ah! Right-" He did so, and watched her stagger on her feet. The tall woman stood up straight and sighed. She smoothed her hair, smoothed her clothes, then looked up. She smiled, composed.

"Are you perhaps called Cutty Flam-" She began this very cooly, but had to pause when she got a full view of the young man. She had another one of her long, intense pauses, then motioned at what was sheepishly peeping out from behind him. "Is...Is that a tail?"

Franky turned his head to see what she was gesturing at. He lifted it up and wagged it, "Ah, yea. What? Is it a big deal?"

Well, no, Nico Robin thought. But it was very surprising. It looked more like the flesh-colored back end of a snake, and was protruding out from the opening in the back of his speedo. It had the same strange texture as the rest of Franky's skin-one she couldn't name at first in the shadows of the ill-lit room. And was it just her, or did he seem a little green?

A thumping of someone's heavy feet stomping around on the bottom floor made Robin freeze. She could hear voices permeating into the room through the floorboards:

"I'm betting the monster is still here..."

"Ahhh! Please-just kill it! And be quick about it, I only have another few hours-"

"Alright, alright; just calm down already. Look-you go check the rest of the downstairs, I'll go upstairs."

"O-Okay...b-b-but what happens if I find it!"

"Just call me over!"

There was the sound of stomping feet and a door slamming behind someone.

Chopper paused. "Um...Zoro? That's the closet-the stairs are right over there."

After a second, the door opened. "Yea...I knew that."

Franky was seemingly listening to the conversation below him. He smirked and crossed his arms. "And to think that pyro is actually the head of the Red Guards-Whoa! Where do you think you're going?"

Robin looked up, one foot still on the floor while the other was hanging out on the other side of the window. She paused like an animal spotted by a predator, about ready to sprint out to the grass below. "Um...I..."

Before she could move, younger-non-cyborg-reptillic-version of Franky walked over and grabbed her roughly from the window. "Oi! Are you crazy, woman? That's a steep drop-you could hurt yourself."

"It's just a jump from the second floor," she muttered, tearing his hands from her. "I'm sure I can walk away with just a sprained ankle or something."

He huffed. "Try a broken arm. Anyways, you could try being normal and walking out the front door."

At the word 'normal', Robin glowered at him. Was there really anything 'normal' here? She let it go, though, for the green-haired knight's stomping was once again echoeing through the house-up the winding stairs.

Franky had to grab the collar of Robin's shirt to stop her from returning to the window. "Alright, I'm starting to see the connection. Obviously you don't want to get caught."

"That would be highly relished, I think-so if you would be kind enough to let me go..." She wiggled in his grip. Oh, what she wouldn't give to have her devil fruit powers back-even if he did resemble one of her nakama to a great degree.

"One question, woman-why's he after you?"

"I ate something that didn't agree with me. Oh, and I seemed to have been mistaken for a weed by a very tempermental Queen Nami."

Franky stroked his chin with his free hand. "Queen Nami, hah? Yea, I see your point."

The footsteps were getting closer. She could hear Zoro mutter, "Now which door could it be...damn doe-eyed tanuki didn't say..."

Obviously Robin was at the edge of panic...well, she would have been if she was any normal frightened person. She was, however, quite surprised when Franky threw her on his back and growled, "Hold on-I'm helping you."

"How?" she couldn't help but squeak. She heard the doorknob behind her being turned. The door began to open.

He briskly walked to the window and climbed out of it.

/

They were falling in the air-for a split second. Then Franky flung himself to the wall, gripping it with his splayed fingers and toes. Amazingly, he stuck. Robin blinked, her face nuzzled in his neck. She recalled to herself that some species of reptiles-specifically lizards, or geckos-had special setae on thier feet that let them adhere to a numerous amout of surfaces. The sun behind her swept over Franky's skin. His dry skin, which she now saw, wasn't just dry. It was covered in greenish-tan scales, which glinted in the sunshine. Seems he was more reptile than she had first thought.

Quickly, the lizard-man climbed down the outside of Chopper's house. He landed on the grass and helped Robin off his back.

"Thank you," she muttered.

"Don't thank me just yet."

Suddenly, they were spotted by said owner of the house, peeping out the window of his parlor. He instantly screamed, "EEEE! There's that dirty human girl! What are you doing in my house, you filthy monster?"

"Huh?" came Zoro's voice from above Franky and Robin's head. "What?"

"Run!" Franky pratically shoved Robin all the way from the house into the grove of cherry trees. They sped towards the forest of twisting trees bordering the house. Just as the lizard man shouted out his command to Robin, Zoro leaned out the window and spotted them. He grinned to himself, and leaped out of the window to land with a small crater onto the reindeer's lawn. He stood up, unharmed with his heavy armor intact, and chased after them. Whichever cherry tree or patch of flowers got in his way, he easily cut down with a swipe of his sword.

"Crap!" Franky said, looking behind them as they entered into the dark of the woods. "He's behind us...whoa, how can he run that fast in that suit of armor-"

"Less speculating," Robin said beside him. "More running!"

The duo weaved through the maze of red-tinted trees barely splotched with sunlight, trampling the encroaching underbrush. The red knight was not far behind. He had an insane grin on his face that Robin felt for sure wasn't characteristic of her usually calm and concentrated swordsman-san. Was he always so...bloodthirsty? when chasing down his prey?

Robin could feel Franky getting a little winded after a while. As they delved deeper into the forest, the trees became thicker and thicker, and the underbrush more wild. It wasn't long before they were nearly washed over in darkness. They passed by a very thick tree-Franky stopped, grabbed Robin, and shoved her into the crevices of the wood's trunk. He pressed himself against her, and when she tried to interject, he put a finger to his lips. "Shh."

The raven-haired woman obeyed. They listened to the dead silence of the woods. At first, there was nothing. Then, they could hear the sound of the Zoro's metal boots crunching the undergrowth, slowly in an attempt at stealth. Robin's heart went to her throat; he was very close. Perhaps only a few yards away.

Suddenly, something was being pressed onto Robin's lips. The mouth of a vial. The woman immeadiately pursed her lips to block the liquid being tipped down. She gave a glare at Franky, who growled in frustration.

"Drink it," he whispered hoarsely.

'_No_,' was the resounding answered displayed on her face. For one, she didn't trust the edible substances in the place. For another, she didn't know if she could even trust the people who resided here. It seemed that almost all of them were trying to kill her-could this perverse version of Franky really be any different?

A twig snapped behind her, under the sole of a heavy boot. Both of them froze like frightened rabbits.

After another moment, another twig snapped from farther away. But only a few more yards. Sooner or later, they would be discovered by the geographically-challenged swordsman.

Franky glared hard at Robin. He mouthed, "_Drink it, or we die_."

Robin pulled her lips back into a line. His point was accurate-and there did seem to be no other way out.

Finally, Robin relented and drank the vial.

She cringed. It tasted like rotten raspberries.

/

As soon as Franky saw her gulp a thimble full down, he instantly turned the vial to himself. He drank the equal amount, and both of them waited.

Robin paused, then glared at Franky. Her expression read, "_Is something suppose to happen now_?"

He lifted a single finger up, as if indicating, "_Give it a minute_."

She did, along with him. After a seemingly long minute, still nothing had happened.

The footsteps were getting closer. Robin could practically here the swordsman_ breathing_. She gripped Franky's flamboyant vest, as if to plead with him to think of something else. Or perhaps to shake him for failing her.

Suddenly, she felt very odd. Odder than when she had eaten the radish.

And then, she was falling.

Well, it felt like falling; in retrospect she realized it wasn't. It seemed her body had gotten very tiny, and while she gripped the also shrinking Franky, her torso bounded down with her shrinking legs to meet her tiny feet. Like a coiled spring stretched to its limit and released, she snapped down to the ground below, and found herself the size of...well, her thumb. Franky snapped to his tiny size next to her, and she saw he was still a head taller than her. She wondered at thier clothes adjusting to thier current sizes-she was thankful, but found that it made very little sense.

In the end, she didn't worry about it.

Franky looked down at his new size, then up at her. He grinned, mouthing: "_See? Told ya_."

Robin couldn't help but roll her eyes. Yet she smiled-flaunting his success was just such a Franky thing to do.

The stomping continued, and it made the woman jump. It now sounded like thunder, and made the ground shake like an earthquake. Quickly, the duo took to the forest of oversized fungus that seemed to carpet the clumping of bloodred trees. Robin huddled beside Franky, and they peeped out to watch Zoro meander by.

They could hear him grumble to himself, "Wha...I was sure they were over here...Jeez, that ero-king better be paying me double for all this overtime I'm doing..."

The lizardman and the bookworm stared at the red knight's back as he quietly crept away, and waited until he finally vanished in the darkness of the forest. His footsteps and his muttering sounded farther and farther away, until it too was consumed.

When he was gone, Robin collapsed on her knees. She sighed, trying to remember how to breathe normally. The stress of today was really taking a lot out of her. She didn't care if Franky saw her tired-it wasn't the same Franky afterall. Usually, she showed her nakama no emotion at all-but what with her being lost, alone, and now powerless, she found her old values being squashed under her much larger objective of self-preservation. She reasoned focusing on getting out of this place was much more important than harboring her feelings from sight.

After the adrenaline inside her flowed itself out and her breath had returned to normal, the raven haired woman looked up. Franky was watching her, as if he was waiting. She watched him as well, until she finally said, "Where are we?"

"In Blood Wood," he replied, his voice flat. "We've shrunken down into the forest of moon mushrooms. In case you were wondering what's giving off this creepy greenish glow."

Robin had wondered that. She looked around, and was amazed to see that it was indeed the mushrooms producing the only light in the forest-an ominous glow that equaled the gaze of a full moon. She studied them for a minute, then returned her attention to Franky as he said, "So, babe-just a quick question...am I correct to guess that you're not from around here?"

Robin paused. "Yes," she simply said.

"Uh-huh," he mumbled. After a moment, he then said, "So then, what are you doing here? Taking a tour or something?"

"No. Nothing like that at all. I just...I just fell down here. I don't know where I am, or how I got here. I..." Robin stopped, lost for words. She buried her head in her arms and curled up to lean on the mushroom stalk behind her. After a moment, her muffled voice said, "I want to leave this place."

Franky didn't say anything. A beat passed between them, then Robin looked up. There was something swimming in the blue depths of her eyes; hope, perhaps? Her voice certainly didn't reveal such an uncharacteristic emotion in her: "Is there possibly a way out of here? A way I can get back...to the forest of giant trees?"

The lizardman Franky chewed on the inside of his mouth. "Well...I don't know of any. But I think I might know who does. He's right here, actually...here, follow me."

* * *

x.x I ran out of word room. Crocodile must wait til the next chap. Everyone say "Poor Crocodile." (I'm sure he's very choked up about it...)

Is it obvious I made Franky look like pre-cyborg Franky? Just wondering, good reader.

o.o I should really start thanking you guys for your reviews! They are so appreciated...so very much so. To everyone I have wronged by NOT saying thank you, I thank you...and give you this cookie! *here's one for you, one for you, and one for...wait, you just faved and didn't review-well, here's a muffin instead*

:3 No, seriously-Thank you for your reviews!


	5. The Caterpillar's Lair

Things are becoming much darker in Onederland...

Wouldn't you agree?

* * *

The walk through the forest of moon mushrooms was eerily quiet. The only sound Robin could hear was the buzzing of insects (flies, it seemed, and a vast quantity of them), the dripping of the strange ooze that the bloodwoods excreted from their trunks and limbs, and the peculiar noise that the dead organic matter they walked on produced. While Robin followed Franky, she slipped her fingers across Luffy's hat's surface. She had been lucky in not losing it in this odd place, and had taken it off to familiarize herself with something from the world she knew…the real world, she felt.

As she petted the straw head adornment of her captain, his 'treasure', she could see in her peripheral Franky watching her in his. Probably trying to decipher her and what she was about-Robin knew Franky to be like that. In Enies Lobby, he had been quietly watching her just like this, trying to figure her out while she stared absorbed out the train window. The analytical older man had professed that he simply liked to absorb as much as he could during first impressions, but Robin was sure he had really been 'sizing up' the demon child Nico Robin. First impressions indeed.

She smiled at him and his stare. "What?"

The frown he had been wearing lightened up when she looked back at him. "Nothing. Just...ah, nothing." He turned, and didn't look back at her again.

Robin watched him, then returned her attention to the hat in her hands. As they walked, she turned it over. The young woman was dismayed to find that there was a dark splotch of something on the rim-she touched it, and found it to be dark red and sticky. She felt her stomach squelch at the sight of it. "What...what is this?"

Franky glanced behind him and saw what she indicated. He paused to take the hat in his hands while they walked. "Ah, its blood."

He wiped it away with the end of his vest, as if it was nothing. Meanwhile, Robin became stiff at wondering how she got blood on it. He remarked just as nonchalantly, "You may want to change-you have it also all down your back."

Robin stopped, and after a second so did Franky. A beat of silence went by-then, the woman put a shakey hand to her back. It was true; her entire lower back was covered in sticky blood, starting to dry and crust. She took her hand away and rubbed her fingers together. The stinking liquid dirtied her hands and dyed them a rusty red. The assasin felt the blood in her hand with faraway eyes.

Franky said nothing during this disturbing display, and quietly gave her back the now clean hat. Robin took it with her clean hand and put it carefully back on her back.

He mentioned, "You might want to keep your eyes open for a new change of clothes...not just cause of the blood. You look like you dress has been dipped in centipede saliva..."

Robin looked down at her tight, revealing black dress, which had gotten even more revealing over the past events. She nodded at him, and said, "Is there really a place to find some?"

"Nothing's for sure in this place," he remarked. "Try to keep your eyes open for things-you might get lucky."

Robin was quiet after that. They walked for a very long time in silence, the raven-haired woman behind Franky. When he suddenly stopped, she ran straight into him.

"..." She rubbed her straight nose and looked up in annoyance at the back of his head. He pointed up, up at the tree. Robin followed where his finger pointed, and understood-thier journey had led them to a sort of staircase of glowing fungus, twisting up the trunk of a bloodwood tree to the other side of where they stood.

/

Franky led the way, nimbly climbing up every fungus with his lizardlike abilities Once in a while, at especially large leaps from one to another, he would go back and help the struggling bookworm. At one point, while she waited for him to clamber up one, and she glanced down at the enormous height they had reached of approximately her midsection at her normal size, Robin turned her attention to the secretion oozing from the bark of the tree.

It neatly left a trail skating by the mushroom, leaving it strangely unmarked. She didn't notice this-she walked over to one of the neat streams bubbling from one of the tree's pores and immersed her hand in it. She pulled it out and saw examined the residue on it. She rubbed her fingers together, then wiped it on her tattered dress.

"This ooze," she muttered, loud enough for Franky to hear. "This is the blood."

Franky had just heaved himself onto the fungus. He had heard her, but turned and crouched with open arms. "Up?"

Robin complied, and reached up to grab his arms. He grabbed her and pulled-soon, she was on her feet in front of him. They stood like that, close with thier arms being held by one another, for a minute. Robin looked at his face, seeing how it had changed. He seemed younger-yet it wasn't just that. He seemed...familiar.

She thought hard. She thought of where she had seen this younger Franky. Hadn't she seen a picture of him like this before-in his room of the ship, when she came down to talk to him or simply to sit in silence and watch while he worked? She was sure she had seen a small picture frame hanging around the workroom, with a similar young man depicted arm in arm with a younger Iceburg. Was what she was seeing right now Franky, pre-cyborg?

Whatever Franky was thinking was making him nervous again. He let go of her arms and grinned sheepishly. "Jeez...you stare a lot, don't ya?"

Robin said nothing, but smiled in reply.

He rubbed the back of his head, then looked at the ooze. "Ah...well, its called 'bloodwood' for a reason." He looked back at her, and his grin widened at her face. "You didn't notice any birds, didja? Any animals...any living things? This is a living forest. People get...consumed here."

Robin blinked her large ice blue eyes. A forest...that ate things? She was so daunted by this fact that she didn't hear the rest of what Franky said, until:

"...something about it can't digest the blood. Feeds the flies though. Anyways, we should be definitely safe as we are now. It detects its prey by feeling the vibrations of passerbys with its roots and limbs. And it somehow hears people, so try to keep your voice down."

The woman remembered to Zoro's odd tiptoeing through the forest, and Franky's wordless gesturing. She guessed that thier silent and fleet running had not disturbed the carnivorous trees. And niether did the pitter-pattering of thier now tiny feet. She nodded. "I'll try to remember that. Are was almost there?"

Once again, he pointed up. "That notch above that tree limb is where we're headed."

/

In what felt like an hour (telling time in this forest was impossible, as a cloud of some smokish fog hung over the tops of the sparse canopy to block out any tell-tale sunlight), they finally came to the last fungi that led them to the notch. The trees of the bloodwoods were odd-they were not made of a solid trunk, but of extremely thick vines intertwining around each other, so rigimortis-like in thier tightly bound commune that they formed a single twisted _thing_. The 'notch' was just a forced opening in between two of these vines. Robin peered in and saw a dim light far ahead. A rotting stench hit her nose, nearly sending her backwards and off the edge of conciousness; yet the strong-stomached woman held her own. Without any hesitation, she bent over and dove into the small hole.

Franky suddenly grabbed her arm. Robin let him pull her out the hole, and turned to him. "What?"

He held a finger in her face. "Look, I just want to give you a few tips before you go in there-"

"Such as?"

Franky frowned at her unemotional resolve. "This guy is dangerous-he also doesn't do anything without a price tag attached. Things could get sticky from here on, so...so..."

Robin slowly formed a smile. "Do you want to do talking?"

"That would be smart, I think."

Without another word, Franky began to duck into the hole. Robin watched him; suddenly she said without thinking, in an amused mumble, "Not 'suuper'-just...smart?"

That pulled Franky back out. He stared up at her. "...What?"

Robin blinked, incredulous. She opened her mouth, then closed it. Then she opened it again, "Well I mean...ah..."

She stumbled to find the right way to explain what she meant, but the words didn't come out. The younger version of Franky still wore a blank face.

"...Nevermind." She waved her hand at the opening. "Shall we go in?"

/

The stench was _horrific_.

Robin quickly covered her nose behind her hands. She felt her eyes water. It was as if someone had gutted a whole herd of cattle, strewn them across the floor, and left thier carcasses there to rot. She looked at Franky-it seemed to be having the same affect on him. Yet he locked his jaw against the putrid stink and continued on through the dark.

Thankfully, something was able to choke out the reek of digesting bodies (even if it choked nearly all the oxygen in the air as well). Smoke curled in the air from the dimly lit point they were headed towards, and slipped across them in a heavy fog. Robin peeked her nose from her fingers at the smell of the smoke to better to inhale it. Cigar smoke, she reasoned. From very expensive cigars. Very _familiar_, very expensive cigars.

Robin suddenly stopped. She felt her body shiver and freeze where she stood. Franky stopped as well and turned back. He blinked at the panicked expression she was revealing on her usually blank face. "O-Oi. Let's keep going...hey, whats wrong?"

The woman said nothing. A cold sweat ran down her back. She was familiar with that cigar brand's smoke-but could it really be...? ...Could it really be _him_?

A deep voice confirmed it-"You two...I can't see you in the dark over there. Come closer-into the light."

Robin didn't move. An exasperated Franky had to pratically drag her closer to the soft glow ahead of them. When they entered its circle of light, she was able to see it was exactly who she had dreaded it to be.

Sitting on an enormous moon mushrom, immersed in cigar smoke and wrapped up in his usual fur overcoat, the huge man's eyes widened at the sight of her-it was a tiny movement, but she spotted it even from where she stood. At first, her old boss said nothing.

Then, slowly, a sinister smile bloomed across his lips. In another instant, it curled up his face into a bloodcurdling grin.

He chuckled. "Well...if it isn't Miss AllSunday. What a surprise."

"Crocodile." Robin's face tightened. She clenched her fist. "What are you doing here?"

/

Crocodile laughed again. "Amazing, I can't believe you joined the Mugiwaras...and here I thought this entire time I had killed you..." The disgusting grin reappeared on Crocodile's face. He added in a growl, "Ever resilient, I see."

"I'll ask you again." Robin's voice hinted with dark emotion. "What are you doing here?"

Mr. 0 said nothing. He only chuckled in his throat and grinned at her.

Nico Robin froze again under Crocodile's cold glare. At that murderous gaze, panic fluttered in her chest-she felt the command to run ringing in her hand.

She decided to listen to it.

Suddenly, she grabbed the silently watching Franky's wrist. "Franky! Lets go!"

"H-Huh?" Tripping, Franky let himself be pulled. "Hey! Wait a minute, babe-I haven't told him what we want from him yet! Come on-"

Crocodile watched, seemingly with boredom, as the pair dashed away out of the light and towards the exit. He sighed a cloud smoke, then lifted his hand. He swept it horizontally.

Robin was halfway out the tunnel. Yet before she could take another step, the tendrils of bloodwood began to shake violently around her. She stopped, gaping with Franky. From the ground up, sand began piling on top of each other to reach the cieling, until it had made an enormously thick wall. It swallowed up the dim light of the outside and blocked thier path.

The woman glared hard at the wall, defeated. Crocodile laughed.

"Kuahahaha! There's no where to run, Nico Robin! So why don't you be decent, and come back over here...?"

Robin stood still, mulling it over in her head. Franky was looking straight at her for answers on what to do-she didn't look at him, but continued to glare at the impenatrable sand wall.

Finally, the raven-haired young woman turned and began to slowly walk back to Mr. 0. Franky wasn't far behind.

"Oi," he muttered at Robin. "Mind explaining? Miss AllSunday-"

"It's Nico Robin," Robin nearly spatted back. She paused, bottled her anger, then muttered, "Don't call me that. And don't say anything...this man is more dangerous than you can realize."

Franky lifted his eyebrow and squinted. But after a moment he nodded and mumbled, "Just don't get us killed, babe."*****

Crocodile waited until Robin reappeared in front of him in the light. He huffed on the cigar between his teeth for a while. Then he growled, "You should be dead. I hate when the things I prey on still continue to walk and breath."

"Are you going to kill me then?" Robin's face was blank, as was her reply.

"Kuahahaha-very straightforward." The grin returned to his face, ever bloodthirsty. "Yes, my dear, I am going to _kill_ you. You, and you lizard friend as well..."

Robin felt Franky tense up behind her. She heard the cracking of knuckles. Did he really think he could do anything to this monster of a man?

"...Your very living existence is a humiliation to me...and I never let anyone who humiliates me live for long."

"Then kill me," Robin spat. Her hands clenched into a fist. She glared in defiance at Sir Crocodile. "Kill me-and let him go...Just get it over with."

"Oi!" Franky was quick to leap against Robin's sacrificing of herself. "Stop it! That's not what I meant!"

At her deathwish, Crocodile's grin crooked to one side. "Hm? Are you really so quick to death, Nico Robin-?"

He suddenly paused, as if a thought had just occured to him. His grin returned to a smirk.

"Tell me, Miss AllSunday," he said. "Do you think this is just a dream...?"

/

The cavern became silent.

Robin crossed her arms. Yes, that was the conclusion she had come to. And it made sense to her now-how else could all of this be possible? Perhaps she was under the affects of some strong hallucigen, or having a very detailed and realistic nightmare.

And if she died...wouldn't she then wake up?

She frowned. "If it isn't, then its obvious who's behind this hoax-being you are the only one who's retained any memory of me."

"M...Me? As the one behind this?" Crocodile suddenly flung his head back and laughed. "How ridiculous-you think I have some way to make an illusion this enormous?"

Robin swallowed. Who else, then? Who else could be behind this? ...My nakama doesn't remember me..so much has been twisted from reality in this place...either I'm still asleep, or-"

Crocodile's snarl cut her off. "Who is behind this? You little fool-it is obvious. It is the Red King."

"What?" Robin lifted her head. She looked straight up into the eyes of Crocodile, who only had his head revealed in the cloud of expensive cigar smoke.

"The...Red King?" Franky muttered this in disbelief behind her.

Crocodile smirked. "Our bloody sovereign-the bastard." He took a long drag of his cigar, then continued, "As a joke, he took me and deformed me into this disgusting, putrid creature, and stuck me in here-to wait for you."

Nico Robin repeated the latter of what he just said, and Crocodile's smirk grew. "Yes, I'm suppose to tell you some riddling information I know-then send you off on your merry way in whichever direction he chooses to give you. To the Ultimate Goal. To make you suffer along the way towards his trap."

The woman blinked her huge blue eyes. The...Red King? Who was he? What did he have against her...or her nakama?

She snapped to attention as Crocodile continued darkly, "But I refuse my orders...I don't simply follow the commands of some omnipotent being calling the shots. And while your suffering would be an enormous satisfaction to watch, my Miss AllSunday-"

Robin cried out. She was suddenly being lifted into the air-sand from the huge man's arm had jutted out of the smoke to wrap around and grab her. The grains began to squeeze against her, making her grit her teeth in pain.

"-I think it would be much better if I simply killed you, here and now, and save the devil from his own pleasure!"

The sand enclosed and crushed Robin's middle. She screamed from the pain.

"ROBIN!" Franky leaped towards her, prepared to intervene.

"Stay back!" the raven haired woman shouted. "Stay back, Franky!"

The lizard man faltered, but looked desperately at Robin. She willed him to stay put with every fiber of her being-he saw it in the way she glowered at him through the teeth-gnashing pain. His tail lashed in the air to fight...but he stood down and stepped a few paces back.

Crocodile's eyebrow lifted at thier little interaction. "Hmmm? Nico Robin...who is this bastard to you?"

Robin snarled, a very uncharacteristical expression for her. She wouldn't reveal the identity of one of the newest members of the Mugiwara crew to this monster. She glared through the smoke, which was beginning to clear from Crocodile's sudden attack. She was surprised at what she saw.

He was in his trademark fur coat, which hung on his shoulders and covered most of his broad, bare chest. She had rarely seen his chest unclothed when working with him, and found it was covered in scars and marks from years of consistent fighting. This was strange, for all of her nakama had had no distinguishing marks on them-at least Nami's shoulder and Sanji's hand hadn't. But that wasn't surprising. What was surprising was what the coat tried to cover, but could not for the thing's enormous length. From the waist down, Crocodile was...was...a worm?

No...more of a caterpillar. A plump, curled up caterpillar, with the shape and markings of a monarch's un-metamorphosized larvae in green and black stripes. He sat on one of his curls and gripped her with his sand powers. His smirk died as he saw that she could see him. He faced her like that for a moment-then, a pulsing vien appeared above his brow. Humiliation stung his expression.

Robin screamed again, the grip around her tightening. The sand climbed up around her body, past her legs and up her chest. She struggled uselessly.

"Bitch," he snarled. "I may not be able to suck out your life in this world...but I can at least suffocate you-"

Without warning, there was a distracting sizzling in the air. Robin felt her hair follicles stand up straight all over her body-suddenly, there was a flash of light shooting across her line of vision, and she was falling.

She landed on her side hard on the ground. Her body hurt around her middle, bruised in several areas. Robin forced herself to shake off the intense pain and look up as another familiar laugh echoed off the walls of the large room.

"YAH ha ha ha ha ha...Crocodile. You really shouldn't try taking matters in your own hands. Especially when you're ill equipped as a mortal to challenge godly affairs."

* * *

...This was over 2,750 words.

Meh-who cares about personal goals? Seriously.

:3 Sooooo first time writing Crocodile. And he's a caterpillar! (all the fangirls say "KAWAII~!" ...and then they were murdered by caterpillary Crocodile, who wasn't amused) Ah, one of the scariest villains in anime history...well, he scared the shiznit out of me when I first watched One Piece in my younger years. He wasn't OOC was he? Just wondering, dear reader.

I should warn you...I enjoy EnelxCroc. So there MIGHT be some underlying yaoi in the next chapter...might be. Not to worry-if you close your eyes and bathe yourself in holywater, dear reader, you probably won't see it.

Today, I wrote the last chapter of this fic. I CANT BELIEVE MYSELF! Now I'm eager to finish this story so I can post it. It might take another...5 chapters or so? I dunno-work with me here.

Thanks for reading, dear reader~!

*** UPDATE: kyah! I am so embarrassed-when rereading this chapter, I suddenly noticed that I had left out an important line of Franky's when I had retyped this and posted it. It makes more sense to when Franky says 'that's not what I meant' shortly after. My deepest apologies~! *slumps on ground with face in the dirt***


	6. The Cat's Deal with the Caterpillar

"You okay?"

Robin looked up at the young Franky crouched beside her, hovering. He looked worried.

She smiled weakly and nodded. "I'm fine."

Franky stood up as she did, and took a step beside her. She looked at the scorch mark on the ground, from where the light had been thrown at. It was as if lightning had struck and sliced through Crocodile's attack.

Lightning...

Robin looked at the air to the left of Crocodile and over his head, and saw Enel.

He was reclining on his side as he floated, as if he were lying on a couch. A bored expression was in his eyes, yet he smiled tauntingly at Crocodile while he bobbed up and down. The air sizzled and cracked around him.

Franky blinked. "Wh...who is that guy?"

"Another problem," Robin mumbled to him. She stood up straight, ready for anything.

It seemed no one in this world was safe from the changes it produced on your body. Like Crocodile's, Enel's was also amusing (if Robin had been in another place, another time-for now, it was simply paradoxal to the imminent danger they produced for her). His white bandana had been discarded to reveal his short, wavy platinum blond hair-and the pair of same-colored blond cat ears flicking back and forth on his head. His clothes were the same as they had been from Skypiea, with simply large ornate pants, rings and bands decorating his appendages, and a bare ripped chest with bare feet. Yet his drums were missing, and he now had a blond tiger-like cat tail appearing from his back and twitching in the air with excited amusement.

Crocodile, though, was obviously not amused. He bit down hard on his cigar and snarled with controlled strain, "You impudent brat. How dare you interupt my business with a former partner."

His voice was low and deadly; Enel didn't seem afraid. He grinned and said, "Hmm-what? Call me jealous."

"I'll call you 'legally dead'-!"

Sand shot out of Crocodile's arm and extended from him to spear at the blond. It flew through the air at him, but he did nothing but grin wider. The insane man didn't move.

The sand bashed itself against the wall behind him-to Crocodile's hidden irk, Enel had vanished in a flicker of light.

Crocodile's arm returned to normal at his side. He huffed on his cigar, grinding his teeth. Then with a sigh he took it from his mouth and breathed smoke into the air.

"Giving in?"

Crocodile looked up. Franky and Robin looked over his head. In a flicker of blue light, the Bilkan appeared there. He floated stretched out on his stomach, with his chin placed on his laced fingers sitting on his elbows. He was set vertically parallel to Crocodile, and was inches from his face.

The grey-complexion man returned to his cigar, as if he was ignoring Enel. The paler man sneered in boredom. After a long moment, the Bilkan decided it would be fine to flicker by his side and hover there, upright with his arms crossed.

A big mistake.

Crocodile lashed out and snatched at Enel, barely giving him a moment to evade. His face was priceless as he vanished in blue light-a look of unamused surprise. When he reappeared, Crocodile serpentined high into the air to meet him there. A second later, before he could breathe, his chest was being crushed between the hammer of Mr. 0's attack and the oozing wall.

In the spray of blood and sand, Crocodile was the one to smirk. Enel locked his jaw, and against the pressure on his ribs and the sand leaking around to hold him in an anaconda-like grip, he glared at him.

"In pain?" asked the older man. "Hmph. It's your own fault-for intervening in my affairs."

"You're making an extreme error, insect." Enel's voice was low, though the end of his lips were twitching up.

Crocodile lifted one of his thin eyebrows. "What an amusing string to pull for your last words." He then added darkly, gripping tighter while the smoke of his cigar hazed his face, "But as usual, your addled brain has misled you. Right into my business. You should keep your whiskers out of things that don't relate to you, _cat_."

Enel sneered, full of mock that made Crocodile bite harder down on his cigar butt. "Ahh, but that's where you're wrong, Wormie...it seems I'm in this little plot of His too; after all, why else would I be here-"

An utterance of pain suddenly left the blond man's lips; he was smashed harder against the bleeding wood, with all of Crocodile's strength in an instant. A pulsing vien was protruding from the man's thick neck as he snarled at the Bilkan:

"So you _are_ working for Him...? Are you doing his dirty work too? Well, goody for me: you can send a message to him from me. Tell the bastard...I'm not losing to him! He thinks its funny making me look like this-putting me in this hell hole-then telling me I have to give out information to some specific person and fade out of existence...! ...Well, that's not gonna work for me. Tell him-tell that bastard that! And tell him something else-he's about to get a wakeup call real soon-I'm not playing his game!"

There were few times Robin knew of that Crocodile raised his voice. She blinked her eyes wide as she and Franky took a few instinctive steps away from the two.

Amazingly, a triumphant grin spread across the blond man's face. Through the pain, he uttered brightly, "Glad...to hear it."

Sparks fluttered across the Bilkan's skin. The air hissed with electricty around Enel as his skin shone a bright blue. He burned so bright with light, Crocodile had to squint and the detached duo of Robin and Franky shielded thier eyes.

"Give it up," Crocodile barked, his face convulsed from the pain of his pupils. "You can't escape me with your little static trick-sand doesn't conduct electricity. _You're dead, cat!_"

"Yes..." A grin grew across his piercing bright face, as he muttered over the hissing hot air around his body of pure shaped electricity. "But surely you know what happens to sand when it undergoes extreme temperatures..."

Crocodile stopped. After a split second, in which the electricity of the air chirped like flocks of tortured birds, his eyes widened.

Sand quickly slunk back into the form of the man's arms, with a quick snap. He slunk back to his fungus, and glared at the blonde while he didn't move from the great height he had been slammed into, choosing to hover and gloat.

"YAH hahaha...what's wrong, Crocodile? _Afraid of losing your other hand?_"

Enel flipped back his head and laughed. Crocodile was shaking with rage-it was barely a shudder, but to Robin's trained eye, she could tell her old boss could barely take this insult on his person. "Why the hell are you here?" he snarled, barely restrained. "What's your part?"

Enel smirked, his eyes still dancing malevonently. "I'm here to shuttle the girl to the Waste. I'm guessing you haven't told the woman about the way home and the Red King and...what not? Oh, that's right. You're trying to _rebel_."

Robin stiffened. Crocodile, he..._he knows the way home?_

His smirk turned into a sneer. "You know that won't work. You'll get wiped off easily."

Crocodile's growl dripped with poison. "If you're so confident in your King, then I suggest taking your ass-kissing carcass somewhere else. I've no time for flea-bitten cats when I've got former employees to snap in half."

"No...I think I'll stay actually. I'm here on my own business. For...personal gain."

At that, Crocodile's interest peaked. Yet niether his voice nor his face showed it: "Business? What are you talking about? And why the hell are you telling me this...?"

Enel sniffed. "You're the only competent person I've seen to date in this place...and I know you have a certain affection for...higher offices."

Crocodile grinned. "Hm hm hm...What exactly are you talking about here, kid?"

"Isn't it obvious...?" Enel's grin grew as he said this, to the point of maniacal. When he blinked himself out to reappear right in Crocodile's face, it was twisted and curdled on his mouth. "I'm talking about the business of chopping off the Red King's head...ofcourse."

/

Crocodile took a long smoke from his cigar. He wasn't looking at Enel-Enel didn't seem to mind. His cat ears flicked back and forth, and he returned to standing a safe distance from Crocodile's attacks. They stayed like that in silence for quite a while.

Franky and Robin stood in front of them, waiting. Franky seemed itching to fight-or at least to do _something_. He kept glancing at Robin, who was immersed in her thoughts. Nothing was making sense to her; she kept asking the same questions over and over in her head, and got no farther with them. The bookworm, seeing the futality of trying to figure this out here, now, decided in the end to push them out of her head for the time being. She waited to see if some answers would further alight themselves from the duo before her. She also waited to see how her fate would be decided by a bloodlusting caterpillar and a shifty cat.

Crocodile finally spoke: "You've wasted your time coming here, shifty brat. I'm not interested."

"Come off it." Enel flickered and appeared by the older man's ear. "Your intrigued-you can't hide it from God."

"I'm not one to trust raving lunatics." He snarled this and snatched his hook at the air. He missed.

"YAH ha ha ha!" Enel grinned when he reappeared. "I'm not asking you to trust me, mortal. I'm asking you to...cooperate."

"Something else I don't have the stomach for-cooperating with lunatics."

Enel shrugged. "Fine-don't play the game. Stay a _worm_ for the rest of your life-I'm sure you'll get used to it, since you'll never get another opportunity like this-"

Crocodile's immensely irritated snarl cutted him off. "Alright, alright-get to the point. What angle against the King have YOU found against him?"

Enel grinned, glee lighting his eyes at Crocodile's feigned disinterest, but obvious curiousity. "The woman."

"What about her?"

"Why so much attention around her?"

Crocodile snorted. "I never dwelled on it. Perhaps he holds a grudge for her...a very large and complicated one."

"Perhaps..." Enel trailed off, before he vanished. He then flickered to Crocodile's side a second later and said softly in his ear, "But perhaps..."

After that, Enel had a long monologue in Crocodile's ear, one that was too low for either Franky or Robin to pick up on. Yet Robin could see that the former warlord seemed more and more inept in the longer the fellow Logia devil fruit user rambled on.

Franky, as was predictable, was growing more and more agitated in the silence and the constant standing stiff like frightened rabbits. Finally, he couldn't take it and leaned over to growl under his breath at the bookworm, "Do you have any idea what they're talking about?"

Robin opened her mouth to say 'no', but then stopped herself. With a odd note in her voice, she muttered a question, "Do you know who the Red King is?"

"Not a clue," Franky replied, matching his statement with his blank, cynical face. "Just some higher-up guy everyone talks about who commands the Red Guards. Hear he's some sort of dictator. I'm sure I know more, but...the rest is really fuzzy."

Robin blinked at him. She said a question that sounded ridiculous in after thought. "Is he the king of this place?"

"Um...yes? Maybe...no? I'm not sure. I know Queen Nami is the ruler, but...I don't know about the Red King. Like I said, it's really fuzzy." Franky rubbed between his eyes, as if the thought was actually making his head hurt.

'Strange,' thought Robin. It was silly to ask him that question-she knew what was reality and what was fake. Franky's life outside this place-on the Sunny Go, at Water 7-_that_ was real. And she had asked him something he would have known if he had actually been here, for at least quite a time. She investigated further, quietly asking him what he did ("Um...I build stuff for the folks around here.") and where he lived ("I...I don't remember. Look, do you really think this is the time for this? We should be finding a way out of here!"). All his answers were shakey. Static. It was like he was the backdrop of some poorly produced children's play. He had no background.

Knowing this gave her a sense of where she really was. If this insane place of Bloodwood, pastel colored trees, and giant flowers with giant insects was all part of this islands topography and not an illusion, then the mind control on her nakama and refabrication of thier memories was in effect sloppy and flawed. To Robin, knowledge was power-and the knowledge of her enemy's childlike use of thier powers was to her as valuable as having a razor-sharp weapon against them.

"Yes," Crocodile's snapping at Enel broke Robin out of her thoughts. "And perhaps she can kill the witchy redhead. But how is it plausible that she can take him straight when he arises-"

Enel's grin was confident. "How can you be so blind? What we need from her is to make an opening...after that, he's powerless."

Crocodile frowned. "I prefer my plans to not have so many holes in them...And what is to happen when the Red King's offed-are you saying we _share_ the power?"

"Do you really think I am?" Enel crossed his arms and became serious. "When this is all over...only one of us can obtain the throne from that bastard. And that's what will be foretold when the time comes for it."

Slowly, Crocodile smirked. "Yes...and then I can get rid of you."

Enel smirked as well. "What makes you so sure you can win against me? You mere insect."

"Cut the crap." His low snarl echoed off the walls. He bit on his cigar as he grinned, growling "I won't kill you now, since you've caused me to entertain such an illuminating proposition. And I think I might just be interested enough to comply with your plan."

"Oh?"

Crocodile sneered at Enel's bored reply. "But let's be straight with one another, partner. As soon as the sun dies on the end of that day, and this plan of yours either fails or prospers, you _will_ be the first thing I get my hands on. For crossing me, you mangy cat."

Enel yawned. "Call me shaking in my pants."

With a snap, the cat-'god' was out like a light. Yet he nearly caused Robin to fall over in surprise when he appeared standing beside her. "Robin...it's been a while."

"E...Enel." Robin's eyes were wide as he looked at her with a mocking smirk on his lips. Franky stepped closer towards her, snarling at the shifty man.

"You're still here?"

Robin's eyes hardened to an ice blue as she looked at her former employer. A scowl was plastered across his mouth.

Enel was the one to speak: "We're letting you live, Nico Robin. For now. But if you don't listen carefully to us and follow our directions...you won't be living for long."

Robin involuntarily swallowed. She bent her head, silent. Finally, she whispered. "What...do I need to do?"

* * *

Alright...perhaps not as much Croc/Enel yaoi as one could have. In fact...a whole bunch of violence betwixt them. But what can you do? I already word-vomited a Croc/Enel 'm'-rated fic {Fallen Angel}, so my itch to put one in here was extinquished. My dearest apologies.

I'm wondering if the plot has become either much more complex or much more confusing. Hmm...well, thankfully so much more light will be shedded in the next chapter.

Thanks for reading! I hope you can find the time to review-I do like a good festering, or helpful comments.

A con's this weekend, so...the next chap might take a while. Til then!


	7. A Fork in the Trail of Teeth

Time to say goodbye to Enel and Crocodile for a while. :/ We'll miss them, but I'm sure they'll be back.

Whole lotta plot, whole lotta moving of pieces, a good bit of Frobin tidbits...and you've summarized this chapter. Needed to make it to build up to the next one-Red King's identity. Please enjoy!

{P.S. I'm not very happy with the beginning of this chapter...I'm not making excuses~ I'm just saying it would be nice if anyone could review on why it seems to have a funny taste in my mouth when I reread it. o.0}

* * *

Yet Robin was never told what she was to do. Completely ignoring her, Enel only muttered at the pressure of time they were under, and "you're following me now, insect".

She watched as he walked to the barrier of sand and had an arguement with a sadistical caterpillar about his need for it to be disintegrated already, if he didn't mind.

"Shut it, puss." Crocodile flicked his fingers at the wall, from his raised hand. Before the other three, it was reduced to a pile of sand. The sand man returned to his newly lit cigar, acting as if he was already bored with everything in front of him, while the grains slithered on the ground back to his body.

The bookworm, though feeling as if she was being hanged out to dry, quietly complied to the powerful Logia's scalding glare while he lingered at the exit for her. She walked towards him, more relieved at be handed to one madman than to be trapped in this stinking hell hole of a murderer's dwelling place. Yet she stopped. Franky hadn't moved.

Robin looked from Enel to Franky. The reptilic man was hesitating, his hands clenched into fists. His face was contorted in thought.

Enel didn't like to wait. "This is annoying. Nico Robin," he warned, his words like ice. "If you don't hurry up...we can end this right now."

The lizardman finally snapped. Squinting, he snarled, "You damn insane lunatic...and just where is she going? What the hell's going on-someone needs to start talking, or I'll-"

Robin quickly appeared in front of Franky. She stopped him, gently shoving him back from Enel, her hands gently on his chest. "Franky, no..."

Franky looked down at Robin, frustrated and angry. It was obvious he wanted to do something. He opened his mouth to voice this, but Robin's unwavering expression made him finally just twist his mouth into a scowl. When he looked up, Enel was turned around. Staring right at him. Smirking.

"You'll...what? Go ahead-any endeavor you do to stop me should be amusing. Your presence here is not needed-killing a nobody like you will mean nothing to my plans..."

The raven-haired woman felt her blood run cold.

Slowly, she turned around to face Enel. His face changed questioningly, watching her stand tall and imposing. The raven-haired woman stood between them, as a shield.

She stayed like that for a second. "You need me alive. So...if you want me to come quietly," she said, calmly. "Then...you have to leave him be. No matter what happens. I mean it."

What a idiotic bluff. She wasn't surprised when Enel doubled over in laughter. "Ya ha ha ha!" He cried, mocking the unfaltering woman. "What an idiot request! Ya ha ha! Alright-alright, he can come. I won't kill the idiot-but only cause of what you said, and the fact that he's meaningless!"

Franky bristled, his face flushed with anger. "Bastard..."

"Franky."

The blue-haired man stopped, and looked down. Robin had turned her head to look at him, but still hadn't moved besides that. She muttered, "Please...just leave."

Franky's eyes widened. "Eh? What are you saying?"

Robin's mouth was muffled, hidden behind her shoulder. Enel's laughter was the cover for thier secret conversation. "Leave. When we get out. I don't want you here. Just leave, Franky."

To her surprise, Franky scowled. "What are you talking about...don't want me around? That's bull crap. I'm not leaving you like this, with no one-"

"Please." She closed her eyes, emphasizing her words and cutting him off. "Please, I don't...you'll get killed with me. You'll die. And I don't...I don't know what'll happen to you. Here. I don't know if you'll be..."

Franky looked at her, his face calm as she trailed off. Finally, whispered calmly. "Babe, I can't leave you."

Robin blinked. She glared at him, angry for him being a fool. Did he _ever _understand the danger he was in? "Why?"

He paused, a blank look on his face. "Dunno...its fuzzy."

When Robin waited for more, Franky sighed. "I feel like I know you somewhere. And I feel...like I can't lose you. You're important-I don't know why. So, ya...I can't just abandon you."

Robin's eyes widened. She didn't know what to say to this.

The sound of lightning cracking at thier feet made both of them leap.

Enel's smoking finger and the burnt mark on the wood near them marked the Bilkan's growing irritation. He had stopped laughing long ago. Testily, he gave them a bored glare, then thumbed at the exit. "Hurry it up."

/

Robin and Franky quickly followed behind Enel, who decided floating was much better, and to hell with the mortals who could just walk at a brisk pace. Yet Robin suddenly realized something; she stopped.

Franky was quick to grab her arm and pull. "Come on!"

"No...!" Robin slipped her hand from his grip. She whipped around on her heel, to face her former boss. "Crocodile!"

Crocodile had been sitting on his coils, smoking and having his back to them as he seemingly stared at the oozing walls in thought. After a long pause, he slowly turned his head to look at Miss AllSunday. "Hm?"

At having to address him, Robin felt disgusted nausea rise in her throat. Yet she swallowed and said, "Where is the way out? You said you knew...Tell me."

Crocodile just stared.

Robin's face twisted a little in an inward struggle under a skin. "P...Please. Tell me, please."

Enel appeared with a crack at Robin's side. He was snarling. "What does it matter? It's not true-just some lie of that Red bastard's. The only way out, really, is-"

"The way out? Hm...Hm hm. Heh heh heh heh, why it's simple, Nico Robin."

Robin and Enel looked at Crocodile. The man was smirking.

He chewed on the butt of his cigar, obviously enjoying himself. In the silence, Robin inwardly squirmed. She watched as he closed his eyes and shrugged.

"It's not from the way you came in. Obviously."

She nodded. She had guessed it wouldn't be made so easy.

More chewing, grinding his teeth and sucking the nicotine while breathing thick smoke. His smirk widened, and he turned back around. "You have three days. Head for the sea-head for your ship. When you reach it before the third sunset, then you may return to your...reality."

There was complete silence in the cavern.

Robin, hesitating, finally uttered, "That's...it?"

Crocodile waved his hand. "That's it."

She didn't move, and he didn't speak further. The raven-haired woman was burning with questions-questions born from more questions. One burned the brightest-just how was she suppose to find the Sunny Go?

As if reading her mind, Crocodile growled, "Finding your captain would help in some way. Straw Hat..." A grin spread across his face, murderous. "Give my regards to Mugiwara when you see him next..."

Robin froze under his gaze. She hadn't thought...well, ofcourse Luffy was here. It made perfect sense...but, where?

Enel didn't give her any time to ask this. With a hard shove, he got her turned around. "Get moving, woman. Another two sunsets, and this won't matter..."

Mechanically, Robin trod beside the alert Franky as they followed the irked Bilkan. Her rhythm of steps encompassed her thoughts, but she was shallow enough in thought to hear the last thing Crocodile called from his prison, echoing off its walls:

"Good bye, Miss AllSunday. I look forward to watching you bleed out on that beach..."

/

A few minutes later, Robin was outside and forced to drink a vial from Enel. She complied, along with Franky, and was not surprised when she leaped off the tree's fungi and touched down to earth, she was her normal hieght. The other two were as well.

This unnerved her a little. Was it alright to be like this, in the middle of a forest that now could find her big enough to be appetizing? It seemed to not matter to Enel-he lifted a finger to his lips at her, and when she nodded in understanding he turned his back to her and began floating rapidly from them. Obviously he wished them to quietly follow him.

They did, stepping carefully over protruding roots and briskly trying to keep up with the Bilkan. He would stop once or twice, to cast a scathing look at them as they caught up. Then, he would return to speeding ahead of them.

The sun was setting overhead-without the light of the moon mushrooms, which had been left behind, and with the fog overhead receding, Robin could finally see the sky. It wasn't much to look at-the dripping branches weaving together in the canopy let in little light, and what was there was the rays of a blood red sunset. How appropriate.

Robin twisted her nose up at the reek the trees permeated into the air. It was less pungent out in the slight open than it was in Crocodile's lair, but it still had its punch. The ground was overcast with shadow-it squelched and was sticky with some substance that stuck to her bare feet. Fresh blood, she guessed.

Yet after what seemed an hour of walking in near darkness, trying to remain in sight with Enel while slipping past dormant carnivorous foliage and being as quiet as mice, Robin's feet sensed a new sensation of texture invading the ground. It was where Enel decided to finally stop and wait for them both.

Robin stopped with Franky in front of him. She glanced around. Through the blotches of red light that lent light to the ground below, she could see that they were on some kind of path, one made up of white...pebbles, perhaps? 'But this doesn't feel like pebbles,' Robin mused, wincing at the sharp material that pierced her feet.

They were at a fork in the path. Enel was perched on a rotting signpost, like a bird. Or a vulture.

On the signposts, thier were two markers: to the left was a single sign that said 'Way Out'. The other two directing to the right professed, " - Village" and "Tar Swamp". The village's name was illegible, and both were nearly covered over by a parchment that shrieked, "DANGER TURN BACK" in blood red letters.

The Bilkan grinned at them when Robin looked up from reading it. "You'll be going to the right, Nico Robin. A half a day's walk, and you'll meet me at the swamp. That's where will continue on until the Waste and finally the Red King."

Robin lifted an eyebrow, but she didn't appear surprise: "You're not coming."

Enel's gin grew. "No, I'm not. If you can't survive here, then I see no point in going further. Also-my orders are clear...you're to be left alone."

He gave a meaningful glare at Franky. The lizardman snorted and equally shot it back.

Slowly, Enel's body began to lose its opacity. It wasn't long before, in a flickering moment, he was out like a light. And Franky and Robin were alone in front of the sign post.

Franky frowned. and crossed his arms. "...There's no chance of me persuading you to go left, is there?"

Robin ignored him. She turned right and began walking ahead. While sighing and grumbling under his breath, he quickly caught up with her, and resided himself to walking beside the enigmatic woman as she unwaveringly strided to the next checkpoint in her journey.

/

Franky had a deep frown etched across his face. He was in a deadly forest, in a situation too deep for his...fuzzy mind to begin to dissect, and he was having what he felt was one of the few moments in his life where he wished he was wearing shoes. He lifted his feet unscrumpciously from the ground, feeling the needle like rocks they walked on pierce his feet. Robin seemed to pay it no mind-did she even really feel menial pain?

Finally, after hours of walking and with an enormous sigh that made even the raven-haired woman halt, he stopped in the middle of the path to pick out the white rocks embedded in his sole. "Damn," he grumbled softly. "What the hell are these things?"

When Franky had stopped, Robin had turned around. She frowned, feeling hurried-the last of the sun's rays were slipping away like water, leaving her only two left. They didn't have time for dawdling. Yet while he grumbled, she inwardly sighed and walked towards him.

He looked up when she lightly plucked the white pebble from his hand. After scrutinizing it for a split second, she smirked and tossed it back to him.

"It's a tooth."

Franky's jaw dropped. "A wha-EEE!"

In almost a tenory squeal, Franky leaped away from the rotten 'pebble'. The pathway crunched under him-the pathway of, yes, _human teeth_- and realizing he was surrounded, the lizard man began frantically hopping on one foot to the other.

"T-TEETH?" he hissed shrilly. He was desperately trying to be quiet, but he was too disgusted.

Robin watched him dance his odd tango of disgust and mental scarring. She couldn't stop herself from smirking. "So...you're cool and collected about a carnivorous forest that _bleeds_ and _eats people_...but you have a problem with walking on a pathway of _teeth_...?"

"It's human teeth-_human teeth_!" he hissed in his defensive, slowly settling down until he stopped hopping like a housewife spotting a mouse. "That...that's just disgusting! And we've been walking on it-!"

Franky stopped himself as a shudder went up his spine. He crossed his arms and whined, "Horrible-why the hell is there teeth here?"

Robin's voice was hard, but faraway. "Perhaps its a fear tatic."

The cyan-haired young man snorted loudly. "A little extremeist, dontcha think?"

ShhhShhhShh...

Above them, the branches of the trees writhed. Both of them froze, listening and staring like dried fish upwards.

Shhhhhshhhhhhh...

They were like the antenannae of some blind insect, fruitlessly groping at the air above, as if feeling for something in the dark. Or tasting the air for a smell, like the tongue of a snake. Robin could feel her heart echo loudly in her chest-she wanted so desperately to silence it. She felt some innate fear that they could hear the blood desperately being pumped across her body.

Time dragged on forever. Finally, the branches ceased moving. Slowly, they retreated back to gripping around each other in an oozing canopy, and the deadly forest returned to its slumber, still unaware of the creeping humans in its path.

Robin looked at Franky, wide-eyed. Franky looked at her with the same look.

And then it began raining.

/

"Come on! Hurry!"

'I'm...trying!' Robin's glared daggers at Franky's back. Her feet squelched in the stinking sludge she was desperately wading through. It was like walking in wet sand-rain stung like cold needles on her skin and obscured her vision in sheets, as she sloshed through thick mud and blood. Her skin was caked in quite a few areas with brown; Franky had it worse. He was lucky to be in a speedo.

He had his hand around her wrist. He was tugging her across the open space to the destination they had spotted a few minutes ago. A black blob of mass in the shape of a house. It was old, and in ruins along with its neighbors, but at least it had a roof that was still intact.

They hit higher ground, and ran the rest of the way into the shelter. There was no door-no furniture either, except for a table, a piece of polished metal for a mirror, and cabinets. It only had one room, and the roof leaked. The two intruders huddled to the dryest spot in the cabin, and sat on the dirt floor to wait out the rain.

Both of them were shivering. The rain made a soft 'shh' sound with the wind. It battered the house's meager defenses, and permeated through the cracks in the walls, the holes in the cieling, and the naked doorway.

Franky's teeth were chattering, but he grinned at her.

"Lucky we found this village in time, right?"

Robin's face was blank, but her eyes were sarcastic. "Not lucky for the villagers before us...do you really think we're safe in a ghost town?"

Franky chewed the inside of his mouth in thought. "Hmm...you have a point. But it should be fine-the rain around here never last for long. In fact...I can't remember the last time we had rain like this...Or any rain at all, for that matter."

There was a beat of silence. Robin watched as Franky mulled thoughts over in his brain. She turned her head, then crossed her arms and sat on her legs, looking at the ground in thought. "...This place is ridiculous. Why would anyone have a village in the middle of a forest that eats people?"

Franky's grinned returned. "Cheap realty?"

"Be serious."

"Hmm..." In not-so-serious thought, Franky mimicked Robin's sitting position-choosing to cross his legs instead, though-and mused, "You know, putting things in to that light...kinda makes you notice that not alot of things do make sense here. A good many, important things."

Robin glanced in amusement at him as he continued, "Like...why is this place so big in the first place? What feeds these trees so that they can germeate this much-surely there isn't as many schmucks in the world dumb enough to feed this disgusting place. I mean...you get downwind of these trees, and you should, if you're sane, recognize the smell of death right away."

"Says the sane man who thought it was a good idea to hide in a grove of them."

Franky smirked at her barely contained sarcasm. "Oi, we're alive aren't we?"

After a pause, in which the ends of Robin's lips twisted up in acknowledgement, Franky sighed and exclaimed, "Another thing I don't get. What...the HELL...was going on in that tree?"

Robin's face returned to being emotionless. "In your current condition, its hard to explain."

He snorted. "Really? Because I feel fine." When Robin continued to be silent, he frowned. "Enlighten me."

Robin sighed, fatigued. "Franky...please just trust me. This is not the real you right now. This is...this is.."

"Just some figment of a dream."

His voice was bitter. In response Robin's face grew more tired looking. Without looking at him, her eyes narrowed at the ground.

"...That possibility hasn't been completely ruled out."

"It should be!"

She didn't look up. Franky's snarl twisted up his face, as he said hotly, "Look, I know I'm not just something out of your head...I'm real! I'm flesh, and blood-"

"And scales," she remarked. "Don't forget scales."

He snorted again. "Well...haven't I always had scales?"

His retort was so straightforward, so believing; Robin felt the instant need to correct him. "No, you did not." She lifted her head and said, "You had...have, an exaggerated blue ducktail. And three chins."

Franky's face blanched at this, but she continued, "You have sideburns, a enormous upper body, and a gold chain around your neck. Your arms are gigantic, like an ape's-and you're taller, older...much older. And you're made out of skin and metal. You're a cyborg, not a...lizard man!"

Robin stopped, finished. She looked at Franky. He sat in silence. Finally, he blinked dolefully at her.

"Well...I sound pretty kickass." He broke into a grin.

The expression on his face was so immature; Robin's face fell a little. "...I am being perfectly serious."

Franky guffawed. "So am I!"

Still grinning, he leaned closer to her. "Oi...so am I tricked out with insane weapons? Like...Cannons and missiles and stuff?"

The bookworm blinked at him. "Well, yes...you have missiles coming out of your shoulders. And bullets from your arm. And...well, for a cannon you have a device that connects your arms and allows you to shoot a powerful shot of compressed air."

"Really?"

Franky leaned even closer to her, ignoring her space. Even in the dim light, this close she could still see the sparkle in his eye as he imagined his self's artillery-packed body. "What else? What else?"

Without realizing it, Robin began smiling a little. She described the rest of his assortment of weaponry-his 'strong right', his 'centaur form', his deadly detachable sideburns. When she got to his inflatable backside attack, Franky stopped her excitedly and shouted, "Ow! Amazing-I must be more than just great-Suuper!"

Robin's eye widened. "You..."

Suddenly, she guffawed into laughter. She clutched her sides and let it out, bending over.

Franky sat in silence, watching her tumble in a fit of giggles.

"...Nico Robin, you're kind of creepy when you laugh."

/

"Older...? Really? Exactly how much older?"

Franky and Robin were still sitting in the corner of the tiny house. Overhead, the rain had slipped into the hint of a drizzle on the swiss-cheesed roof. Franky had left when it had begun to clear up a few hours ago, with Robin left to scavenge the cabin. She had found mason jars of fruit preserves-he had found blankets and clothes from the nieghboring houses.

They huddled together, wrapped in the dry pieces of quilted cloth and eating with thier hands in the dark. It was cold, and Robin shivered violently, but there was no way for a fire to be lit here. The wooden furniture was rotten and damp...and there was no use looking in the forest for firewood.

The raven-haired woman looked up from fingering the hem of her new clothes-a wine red sack of a dress that was not at all distinct or flattering. She couldn't remember a time they had talked so much-it was really about things he already should have known. The Sunny Go, the layout of his body, his past, the other Mugiwara's...everything that she knew since she had met him.

"Seven years my senior," she muttered.

He squinted. "Really...huh, that's wierd."

Robin looked up, seeing his face twist in thought. She assumed he found it difficult for his imagination.

"Well", she explained slowly. "You're much younger now. Which makes it all the more sense that this is a dream-"

Franky barked a laugh. "I...I'm younger? Babe, I think you've got it mixed up."

Robin looked up from her sticky fingers and her jar of strawberry preserves to look at him questioningly. "Whatever do you mean?"

The blue-haired youth snickered. He thumbed at a nearby looking glass hanging on the wall. "Take a look in the mirror. Compared to you, I'm not that young."

Completely baffled, Robin had no choice but to silently comply and stand up from her corner of warmth. She quietly crossed the room, and gazed at the reflective surface.

Her large blue eyes blinked. He was right-her face was more fuller, she had shorten in height-and her hair was the same long length it had been when she was twenty, no longer at her shoulders and growing so wild that she felt the need to put it in a ponytail. She looked like she had...'before I met Crocodile.'

Robin stared blankly at her reflection. She felt her hair and looked at it-when had it grown?How was this possible? She couldn't come up with an answer. But she felt that if this didn't make it a dream, nothing would. She looked back up, then with frightened eyes took a step back. In it, she could see a man standing over her shoulder. Grinning, and laughing.

"Fufufufu...mind not being so close? You're breathing on me."

* * *

Everytime Nico Robin laughs...

o.0 An LOLcat _dies_.

No, no-I'm sure they probably don't. But probably, quite possibly, I am going to Oda's reserved circle of Hell for bad little fangirls-very uncanon of me...making Robin snicker-snort. Yet seriously-Robin is possibly the hardest person to write. Maybe it's just me, but its like grinding my forehead against a brick wall in having to make her hold in most of her emotions (s'why I like writing Franky, Sanji, and Luffy so much I guess. Emotions make me happy. =.=). But I like the challenge...therefore, dearest reader, T.T I ask you to not be shy in filleting me if I am doing Robin any injustice-I am open for constructive flames! FLAME ME, PLEASE~!

First time Franky said 'suuper'...does that mean he's slowly returning to his old self again? And why was Enel and Crocodile here...together? Where's the Sunny Go-WHERE'S THE REST OF THE CREW? 8D Hey look! I wrote a suspense-a little on accident! Red King is next. How do I know? *points at half-prewritten chapter she's already working on* Call it a feeling. Yes dear reader-his identity will be revealed next week.

8D Please review-if you can't, its fine. I understand. But I do enjoy your encouragements/constructive flames SO~~!

**Update: AHHH~! My apologies for the sudden addition of a new part-I couldn't resist, dear reader. I finished this last bundle of paragraphs tonight, and simply had to add it in. Forgive my randomness~!**


	8. Mirrors, Cleavers, and Jars of Peaches

When this fic is over...I'm going to polish EVERYTHING.*once again, Dormy-chan's talking to herself. Move along, people-move along*

Oh, hey-there's an OC in this chapter.

* * *

Nico Robin quickly turned around. No one was behind her. She gulped, her body tense.

Franky noticed. "Oi," he muttered, putting down his empty jar down. "You okay?"

"...Of course."

Robin turned around to face him. A small, warm smile was on her lips. "Just a little shaken-it's very astonishing."

The lizard man narrowed his eyes in suspicion, but he didn't say anything. She sat quietly down behind him, and continued eating. After a long measured pause of thoughtful chewing, she finally shocked Franky awake by muttering, "...These preserves would be excellent supplies to take with us, if we only had something to carry them in-like a sack. And we could use the empty jars as containers for fresh water."

Franky nodded, grumbling, "Yea...if the well in this town wasn't poisoned from the blood-soaked ground."

The woman took the time to chew and swallow a spiced pear before she replied. "Surely we don't have that much farther to go to break out of this forest."

She watched as he bent his head down, softly snickering. "Well...I'm not one who knows the entire geography of Bloodwood Forest, but...being that we can see the Frigid Hills over thattaway"-he gestured towards the nearby window, which through the battered shutters Robin could see the hulking forms of sharply chiseled hillsides standing over the tops of the forest's canopy with their white-capped domes touching the sky-"we're not that far away from civilization...then again, we are going to the swamplands. Not sure where that is, but I'm sure in the opposite direction of safety; least it takes us straight to the Heart Palace in the Waste."

"Frigid Hills?" Robin looked up. "Isn't that where you said this Mad Trio is located?"

An hour ago, Robin had interrogated Franky about any possible person who could be Luffy. She described him-a teen aged boy, lithe body, messy black hair, blank eyes-and he said he only knew of one person who fit that description. He had heard that this young man was in a band of wandering eccentrics that traveled across the Waste, the Bone Desert, and the Frigid Hills. They rode about, causing trouble on the island; then, just as quickly as they appeared, they disappeared.

"Ah, well..." Franky smiled, trying to explain. "Yea, but they mostly appear in the Waste-last I heard of them appearing in the Hills was a while ago. I guess they do appear once in a while, but..."

Slowly, Robin nodded. "I understand."

She returned to the jar of peaches, now empty. Her eyes looked up at him-"If we're going to leave soon, then we might need more preserves. And a sack to put them in."

Instantly, Franky was on his feet. "I'll get something to hold them-I'll be at the ruins down the road."

"Fine."

He began to leave, but stuck his head back in. His face was furrowed very seriously. "Be careful not to make too much noise, alright? And don't stray from the house."

Robin nearly rolled her eyes at his constant worrying. Instead, she smiled with reassurance at him-"Alright. I'll be ready to leave when you get back."

Franky nodded and left.

Robin wasted little time after she heard the last of his footsteps disappear from the side of the house. Her eyes locked on the looking glass hanging on the nearby wall. She turned around, pretending to ignore it, and began rifling through the kitchen. She knew there were no articles of canned or jarred food left in this house, but acted as if she was still looking for them-she could feel a pair of black eyes boring into her back as she snatched open drawers and cabinets, looking.

The blue eyed assasin suddenly found what she was looking for-she ripped open a drawer, and heard the bright chinkling of silverware. With deadly grace, she grabbed the first piece of sharp, rusted metal her hand came in contact with and inconspicuously slipped it down under her dress. A few butter knives would have to do, wedged into her brassiere. It was admittedly better than nothing.

She went to grab another handful of knives before moving away, when her fist closed around the handle of something large. Much larger than a butter knife. She glanced down.

A butcher's cleaver.

The shine glinting from the thick blade nearly made her smile. It wasn't like it's drawer mates-it was clean, polished, and without a speck of rust to blemish it. She swiftly hid it beneath her clothes, then began to search another drawer.

/

A few minutes later, she was outside, blatantly disregarding Franky's warning and coming to the side of the house to survey what could be in the shed near the back of the house. The village of ruined houses and blood drenched streets was as quiet as a morgue. Overhead, the moon managed part a few clouds to light the world below-Robin almost wished it didn't. As she trudged through the wet ground, weaving past puddles that rippled with the touch of light rain, the clearing seized with deadly trees seemed to glow in almost an otherworldly sheen, making a knot appear at the bottom of her chest. It tightened in groundless fear as she stepped into a puddle to slosh out and come to the shed.

Robin didn't notice she had just walked across the puddle's water until her dry bare feet touched the ground again. She halted, paralyzed.

A second of time dragged by, making her feel as if she was being dragged across broken glass while having her wrist tied to the flanks of foaming horses. She felt the instinct to just keep walking-keep going as if it hadn't just happened. But she chose to ignore her instincts, for once.

The puddle behind her didn't ripple, with neither the rain nor the touch of her feet on its surface. She fingered the handle of cleaver at her leg, her hands damp. Her adrenaline rushed, and she smiled at the knot tightening in her stomach.

"Are you going to hide in that reflection forever," she muttered, her voice carrying over the putter of the rain. "Or are you actually going to come out and finally face me...?"

/

There was a pause.

Finally, that unnerving snickering vibrated from the small pool. With every syllable the voice uttered, the waters surface rippled:

"Fufufu...what a smart witch you are, Nico Robin. Fine, if you're so impatient to see me..."

The raven-haired woman curled her lip slightly at the voice, but otherwise her face was expressionless when she turned around. As if boiling, the water's surface was spastically bubbling, then rising as if to shoot up in a spout. It grew to well over three feet, hissing violently; then it died away again, to return to its solid form. In its place, was a little boy garbed in ridiculous red clothes.

Slowly, Robin smiled.

At her enigmatic grin, then boy sneered haughtily. He seemed almost outraged. "What?" he said, in a voice too adult-like for a small child. He took a menacing step towards her, his steps rippling. "Something funny? Huh...? Do you think its cute that a little kid's screwed your world up so bad? Because I wouldn't be laughing, witch, if I were you. Not when the nightmare's even over yet-GACK!"

Suddenly, his ankles went past his head-with a loud guffaw before he smacked his head on the wet ground, the boy slipped on the water. His purplish grey hair sprawled around his head, and he looked bewildered. But he was quickly up when Robin stifled a well aimed giggle.

"Sh-Shut up!" the ten-year old snapped, losing his temper. "It's not funny! Stop laughing at me!"

The raven-haired woman took away her hand, but couldn't help the smile. "So...you're the Red King?"

The little kid perked up. He puffed out his chest a little and snorted. "Yes, yes I am. I am Spandai, the Bloody Red King."

Spandai? Robin's eyebrow raised. Mistaking her expression for fear, the boy grinned. "Not enjoying my little game, Nico Robin? Don't be such a spoilsport-it'll be over soon..."

He let his voice trail off. Robin wasn't affected. She kept her face blank, and uttered, "Game? What do you mean?"

Spandai smirked. In response, he lifted his arms to indicate thier surroundings. "Welcome to my world-built just for you. Wondrous, isn't it?"

As if on cue, the overcast sky decided to part away for the moon, letting its blood redlight spill on the village below. Spandai indicated upwards, and Robin's eyes obeyed. It seemed like a normal lunar eclipse. albeit a bit large. Yet...it was _growing_. When it seemed to nearly take up most of the heavens, it revolved around to reveal its sunken face of some amused demonic entity. The face had a cheshire grin. It snickered at her.

Spandai was snickering too, as she could see when she slowly turned her head to him. His grin was just as wide, and his eyebrows went downward with every gloating expression of his.

She cut his laughter short: "How?"

He smiled toothily. "How do you think?"

"Devil Fruit Power." Her answer held little hesitation.

Spandai clapped his hands, laughing. "Ding ding ding! We have a winner! Not a dream, not a drug, but a devil fruit. Smart witch."

Robin watched as with a wave of the child's hands, the moon shrank and the sky became overcast again. He was still grinning when he turned back to her-too evil-looking for a child. "Forgive my rudeness...its been so long since I've talked with anyone. I mean...many are dragged to this island, but I rarely come out to _talk_ to them. They _are_ disgusting pirates afterall..."

He glowered at her. "You're an exception."

The raven-haired assassin politely smiled. "Pirates, you say?"

"Naturally. No others come by this way to escape the marine waters in the archipelago across the water. You slithering snakes try to slip by-I feel as if I'm doing a service for the marines by grabbing you into my funhouse."

For once, Robin disapproved of Nami's navigation skills. Marines right now looked like a walk in the park. Her face never moved an inch as he continued,

"You look so different from your bounty poster...I guess I had a hand in that. You still look _disgusting_."

She smiled. "You have a very strange power-could you tell me more about it...?"

"Don't treat me like a child, bitch!"

The Red King's snap reverberated in the from where they stood, perhaps more than necessary. Robin's smile died; it became a thin, hard line.

Her voice lost its dollop of brightness. "Why are you doing this?" she quietly demanded.

Spandai snarled. "For revenge. Against you-and the Mugiwara's. But you _especially_."

"_Why?_"

At her intensity on the question, the little boy threw his head back and laughed. "Fuhahahaha-no, no! No giving away spoilers for the game."

Robin blanched as he wagged a finger in her face, grinning. "Wanna know? Entertain me-gimme a good run for the next couple of days. I wanna see if you can come up with an answer on your own...you were doing so well from the start. Lets keep going!"

The raven-haired woman stiffly watched him gloat. Her fists tightened, her glare intense.

Spandai sniffed, suddenly irked. "What? Got something to say...? Spit it out-you don't like how I run things?"

Robin's mouth twisted tighter, but she finally opened it to say something. She was surprised into silence when Franky's voice came from behind her.

"Oi? What happened to staying in the cabin-whoa! Who's the brat?"

/

Franky, lugging a huge sack on his back and carrying a thick piece of pipe on his shoulder, took one look at the situation and decided he didn't like it. What was a little kid doing in the middle of this forest? An especially weird looking kid too-with a red nose, dark circles around his eyes, he looked more like a panda cub. Put in ridiculous scarlet clothes for an aristocratic snob's son, complete with shorts coming to his knees, socks to his ankles, a bow tie on his neck and an expensive coat on his shoulders.

He also didn't like the livid expression the kid was giving him at this moment.

Franky stepped beside Robin. He thumbed at the brat and said again, "Who is he?"

"The Red King." Robin's voice was quiet. For some reason, Franky knew she was pissed. How the hell did he know that-she was _always_ quiet! Still, his legs automatically side-stepped from her to a safe half inch. His trunks also tightened. Weird.

"YOU!"

The roar from that kid's body grabbed Franky's attention. "What?"

A pulsing vein was appearing on Spandai's forehead. "Your are not suppose to be here-what are you still doing around?"

"..." Franky turned back to Robin. "You serious? This is him?"

"OF COURSE I AM, YOU ASSHOLE!"

Spandai stamped his foot, positively seething. Robin lifted her eyebrow at his behavior. She looked at Franky, who was snarling at the kid in annoyance.

"Shuddap, you brat." He mouthed off, not minding at all the powers this kid had. "Even if you are the king, you're not on the top of my list for on friendly terms."

The richly dressed kid's mouth dropped. "H...How dare you speak to me like that-you bastard! _I'm the king_-"

"Seriously-if you're the king, then where the hell's the economy?"

"WHAT?"

Franky scoffed, as if he was really talking to a child. "_The economy_-we have, like, no coinage. No market-and our only town is a deserted one in _the middle of a man-eating forest_? Seriously! And your steward the Queen of Hearts isn't doing anything about it, so why aren't you? In my opinion, you're a shitty as a king. I'm not surprised that you're a brat."

Robin had to hide her mouth behind her hand. There was something seriously wrong with Franky's head...with or without his memories.

"SILENCE!"

Franky closed his mouth. But he didn't loose his defiant expression.

Spandai held his gaze, his mouth twisted in a snarl. Then, he sneered. "Fufu...so, seems one of my pieces didn't want to stay in its square. Paradise not good enough for you?"

The blue haired lizard man crossed his arms. "Paradise? If you mean making houses...I don't feel like they're my thing."

"Hmmm..." Robin gestured at Franky, smiling with instigation at the little sovereign. "It seems your power isn't effective on everything, whatever it does. How disappointing."

While Franky looked questioningly at her, Spandai boiled over:

"MY POWERS ARE FLAWLESS! He's just too wishy-washy to realize what he wants..."

The small child suddenly curled his lips to a grin. A menacing grin. "Fufufu...people like him are just disgusting. They should just be squashed."

Robin took a step back as the puddle began to bubble again. It glowed with a strange white light, just like the light coming from Spandai's hands. "Franky..."

Franky hadn't moved. He just snarled at imminent danger. "What is this," he muttered to her.

"I don't know-be careful, he can make anything happen."

Franky cocked an eyebrow up. "Now, when you say _anything_...do you mean-"

_Hssssssssssssssssssss..._

The lavender-haired brat laughed, levitating over the puddle. With a hiss, something was coming up from it. The water evaporated from the tall object, and standing before them...was a gilded floor length mirror. And in its reflection, it held Robin.

And then it glowed with a blinding light.

/

Franky lifted his arm to his face. "What the-"

"Mira Mira no Mind's Eye!"

In the glare of the light, Spandai's voice echoed in Robin's head. It tore through her skull, in excruciating pain. She cried out, clutching her head. Something was being torn from her mind, with the claws of some beast. Tears welled up in her eyes at the pain, as she kept screaming.

She felt Franky's hand on her shoulder. "Robin?"

The pain was slipping away. She was shaking,Slowly, she looked up. She saw Franky's face, panicking. The light was gone. "I'm fine," she weakly muttered.

"Yea, good," he muttered, pulling her up. "But we've got other problems. We've got company."

Robin's ears perked up at that. Just as someone greeted her from behind.

"Miss AllSunday. What a surprise."

* * *

Hurp puh derp...Dormy-chan sleepy.

Sorry this chap is so late...like, x.x nearly a month late. A lot has been going on-and my admission to college is the big topper. I don't know when I'll have the next chapter-I'm off to put a warning about my OC villain Spandai so people will know to run away from my fic for its noncanon-tude.

Reader, this is my first OC (besides the sleazy game vendor guy in Near to You). I have no idea what to make of him (cept that I think I made who he's the offspring of too obvious)-he wasn't my first idea of the Red King-he was more last minute. It sucks when you know the beginning, the end, and the antagonist of a fic...but the middle is has determined as jello and the antagonist is still a question mark with 'Mira Mira' put in asterisks beside it. Therefore, reader, dearest reader, SWEET READER...please give me your thoughts! I do not care if they are scathing, or one-liners, or COVERED IN SPARKLE PAPER. I just want deh flamez of truthz!

Also, the cleaver has significance.

Like big significance.

...LIKE JABBERWOCKIAN significance.

...Why am I releasing spoilers for my own fic? Agh, I need some sleep. =.=


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